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Sehwag Q &A

by Rohit

Q. How does Sehwag ‘milk’ the spinners?

A. He dumps them over cow corner.

Q. When a spinner comes on, Gambhir askes Sehwag ‘Let’s keep rotating?’ Sehwag nods vigorously. What does he do?

A. He slogs the spinner out of the attack. He assumes Gambhir wants him to rotate the bowlers.

Q. Why is the Sri Lankan squad planning to lodge a formal complaint?

A. They are certain the balls used were of poor quality. They plan to use Sehwag’s testimony which goes, ‘I only hit bad balls today’

Q. Which cricket manual consists of a single page?

A. ‘Sehwag’s introduction to battting’. The page reads, ‘See ball, hit ball. Don’t see ball yet? Wait for the ball boys to get it back. Then hit it’ There’s also a footnote, ‘Don’t forget to thank Sachin’

Q. What was the one positive of Sehwag getting out before Dravid?

A. That he didn’t get to bat with Tendulkar. Otherwise the whole innings would have been dedicated to ’Tendulkar’s advice of waiting for the bad balls’

Q. How many sane people thought Dilshan was the next Sehwag before the Brabourne test?

A. 780

Q. How many still think so?

A. 3 including Dilshan himself who is wavering. The other two are Sri Lankan fishermen who have been stranded at sea for the past two days...

Q. What is Sehwag's favourite dessert?

A. Triple layer chocolate cake. His motto in life is 'Why settle for one when you can have three?'

Any suggestions?


Gaurav Sethi said...

Haha! Even though Sehwag is no laughing matter, Jatman sure is - that was funny Rohit

Rohit said...

Thanks...When you say Jatman, I have a mental picture of Sehwag in tights with a cape...and that is funny!

Anonymous said...

very smartly related piece about SuperSehwag

Mahek said...

Don't know about others but the umpires sure seem to think Dilshan's wicket isn't important. The two decisions he got were the kind umpires reserve for tailenders.

scorpicity said...

Axcellent post!

Rohit said...

@ Anonymous...

Thanks a lot! Super Sehwag it is.

@ Mahek...

That's because it isn't. They know as well as anyone else that he is not a patch on Sehwag.:-)

@ Scorpicity...

Thanks. Appreciate it....!

Mahek said...


Dilshan has only just started opening the innings. I'd rather wait and see how he performs for a couple of years before passing judgement on how he compares to Sehwag.

Rohit said...

Come on...Dilshan is a couple of years older than Sehwag! Even assuming he may develop the talent, do you think he has the time to achieve what Sehwag has?

Anonymous said...

Yeah. Only Jatman can drive ur imagination wild. The master blaster has never got me as excited as Jatman. Jatman routinely plays out in reality what is only possible in fantasy. The line betn actual & fantasy gets blurred. As JRod says u get a spiritual orgasm. Hail Jatman.Ye banduk se nahi dagta par tope se.

Mahek said...

Well he's just 6 hundreds behind Sehwag so he CAN catch up if Sri Lanka play enough cricket and he keeps up his good form. To say that he's not even a patch on Sehwag is as one-eyed as it gets.