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Jatman's New Year's Resolution.

by Naked Cricket

2009 is over, khalaas. For 2010 I have fresh ideas. Whatever happened in 2009 I will not repeat in 2010. I have had enough of these “Man of the Match” ceremonies. I’m told their short form is MoM, ok – but no more for me. Not that I don’t want any more MoMs – I want it to be called “Sehwag Ki Maa” ceremony – that will ensure only I will win the award – for a good mother will first bless her son then other mother’s sons.

I also feel Halchal Singh should have a special ceremony – he likes MoMs too; for him I suggest we call it Teri Maa Ki. As Gauti says, MoM’s the word!

What else can I say? I have played as captain, vice captain, it’s been a long time since I was a 12th man – I do not miss it much. But I still wish to play in a new position in 2010; I have always admired Rahul Dravid, especially his wicket keeping abilities. And then you see with MS, the power of Indian cricket is behind the stumps.

Even if I cannot be a wicketkeeper, I would like to be the helmet behind the wicketkeeper. Anyway I am used to scoring runs in clusters, 4s and 6s – so when I the helmet hit the ball or the ball hits me – I will have scored 5 runs.

I also want to open the batting with Gauti, nobody sings my praises like him. Together we like to sing each other’s praises – off late I have started to give interviews, they can be a lot of fun. I like to be honest, but because most people are not honest my interviews are very likable. Even I like them. I also like Gauti’s interviews, and he likes mine. In 2010 I want to change this – I want to give interviews as Gauti and make Gauti give interviews as me – now that I have hair it will be difficult for them to tell us apart. We are like brothers anyway.

You must be thinking why am I talking so much – this is the new Jatman. In 2009 I wanted to clean Delhi cricket, in 2010 I am going to speak with the West Indies Cricket Board and the West Indies Players Association – you’ll never guess what I’m planning. But I still don’t want to have anything to do with that Stanford guy – dirty man.

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