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Quick fix solutions for another do-or-die match

by Gaurav Sethi

Apply lessons learnt from the IPL, play four foreign players against New Zealand. On such short notice, only the Lankans will be available. If this approach pays off, play four Kiwis in the finals. Rest Nohit Sharma and his entourage. What this team lacks in hair can be made up with Saurabh Tiwary.

Use MSD as a bowler, recycle BossDK as a wicketkeeper. Convince MSD to bat at 3, that’s the only way he’ll believe the conditions are easy and score big runs.

Seeing as both batting first and second have been rough, India must device plans to not bat at all. This may not be easy, explore a first time declaration in a one-day game with the Kiwis. Backlash: The match was fixed.

The Sehwag threat must loom till the very end. To facilitate this, provide false information on the team sheet, and drop Sehwag down the order with every wicket fall. At the same time, to counter any feeling of wellbeing in the Kiwi camp regarding Sehwag’s fitness, ensure he goes through his full fitness regime in full view of the cameras.

Look upbeat throughout the game, nothing irks the Kiwis more than a happy opposition. Lotta banter in Hindi, and random abuse in various regional languages, this will further confuse the black caps.

Use Lankan tactics with the umpires, especially with Dharmasena. Befriend him, speak to him in Sinhalese, and if and when in English, with a strong Lankan accent. BossDK as keeper could wear a Sangakkara mask. Sehwag must continue to hug Rauf.

Play with spongy bat to counter spongy bounce.


pRAFs said...

Jaddu to open both bowling and batting, once his quota's done.....

Gaurav Sethi said...

Extreme shock and awe tactics, could run thru Afghanistan with that

Sujan Rao said...

"random abuse in various regional languages"

Lud it as always NC!