Andrew Strauss loses cool, turns semi-geek, semi-bad guy

Andrew Strauss leading and freeing the team of unpredictable uncertainties

Andrew Strauss has been having a really troubled life. Just when he thought that immortality was his after winning the ashes, the Aussies crushed his ego which by then had reached the peak of Rosemary Bank.

Then, having decided that he was full of shit and capable of no good (equilibrium frame of mind), Australia New Zealand surprise him by losing. “Why me?”, he asks god.

Now he is thinking about such important life and death issues, about the quest to solve his identity issues, about saving the world from inconsistencies, and suddenly he looks up to see his team scoring more than 320 odd runs against South Africa.

His eyes light up: “Are we going to be the team this time? Will we be given the opportunity to knock these buggers out of an ICC Event this time? Are you sure, Lord!”

Another twist awaits him. Cut to two and a half hours later. A certain G Smith is batting on about 120, Strauss is still in his Utopian Wannbreams of course. He is snapped out of that by the Umpire who is just doing the formality of asking the opposition skipper as Smith had called for a runner.

“I am in the middle of a conversation with the almighty and you need a RUNNER? That’s too bad, as I won’t let you have one. The rulebook says that I have full right to deny you if I feel like so. F*ck the rulebook, I won’t anyway allow you. You have no idea how f*cked up my mind is right now, so don’t push it. Aiite?”

Smith replies in a language which could not be understood by any England player as KP wasn’t there.

It is another story that England won this game too and are lost in the pit of disbelief at the moment. Smith can have the last laugh.