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What is it like to be the East Indies?

by Gaurav Sethi

Pak cricket has been full of questions. Till only recently the new kids were asking, what is it like to play test cricket?

Younis would laugh it off, pat the boys, and ask the kids not to ask dirty questions. MoYo would scratch his beard, look blankly into the mid distance, but offer no answer. Shoaib Malik would cry, thinking about Inzi’s retirement, and say, it’s emotional atyachar.

Then tests happened, as did the defeats, at the hands of the Lankans, Kiwis, but mostly at the hands of the Pakistanis.

And not only the kids, but MoYo and the seniors started to ask, what is it like to win a test?

And then one PCB bigwig lashed out at the losers, “You you you…you are not fit to call you you you yourself the Pakistan team”

Which is when a stoned Asif stammered, “We we we will call us East Indies”

And it was only fitting that both East & West Indies lost their games down under today. Moral: It’s not lonely at the bottom.


Reverse Swing said...

there has been wave of bullshit posts on BCC! this week specially against Pakistan and specially by Naked Cricket, I am wondering what might have caused it, an old hate that we Paki-Indians share or just this test of the year PAK and NZ produced for cricket fans.

Come on guys face it!

Mahek said...

Yeah, we hate you because no one wants to play in your country. We hate you because your opening batsmen can't stick around till the team score hits double digits. We hate you because we can't conspire to lose the way you lost to New Zealand.

Get over it buddy. You don't feel delicate about folks here dissing Indian cricketers, do you?

Rohit said...

@ Reverse swing..

No, man. I don't see it either. I think you're being a little too sensitive. Bhajji is the guy who gets dissed the most, according to me. Undeservedly, too(This is for you, Mahek)
However, you have to realize that Pakistan, with the disorganization, drugs and anarchy is a very easy candidate for humorous pieces. The Indians are just too stale and boring in comparison. No offence. It has nothing to do with jingoism. You can rest assured about that.

Mahek said...

Thanks, I would've never guessed had you not told me.

Rohit said...


Reverse Swing said...

ah well, I am not that sensitive I am open to dissed Pakistani team when they are playing like this, but it hurts when u lost after getting so closed that also due to act of couple of shits in team. And also bcoz this post kind of dissing every one else in team which isn't fair, like you go hard at Imran Farhat and Malik but it will not be justice to dissed Aamir and Asif who actually put Pakistan at a position where they could have won it. And lot of other factors which makes it uneasy on ears.

@Mahek, yea opening batsmen are crap but that is not new they are since Saeed Anwar and Aamir Sohail but I don't think we simply put away the match I think we did what we were capable of but this batting line up isn't capable of doing it for us. Yousuf and Umar Akmal can't do it alone no one else is a test batsman. We will look crap like this even after beautiful bowling if we will not find couple of more Umar Akmals and some players who can actually field and catch.

You are going good at test and ODIs so have fun but we are getting down and we need to do something about it and that might be simple just fire everyone in PCB top management.