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Generating Funds - Pee Cee Bee Style

by raj

It's a crisis in the Pee Cee Bee. No, not the team losing. That happens often enough. There is the bigger crisis. Not enough money to siphon.
There's a general body meeting - urgent summons is issued to key functionaries. They collect at the poolside of the chairman's house
We, fortunately, have our own fly on the wall, and here's the scoop
(Two men in hoods enter a fortified home, and are escorted to the poolside. Found reclining in the poolside, is Zarda Beedi, the patron.)
Zarda Beedi: So, Mr Ijaazat, where's the monthly hafta
Ijaazat: Sir, thats what we came to discuss sir. Er....Underling, pls explain.
Underling of Ijaazat: The fact of the matter, is, sarcaar..err..we havent brought the hafta
Zarda beedi stands up in anger: What? What did I make you functionaries for
Ijaazat: Sir, you have to understand. We dont get matches to host these days. No revenue generated
Zarda Beedi: What happened to the tour money? Your boys went to Australia, didn they?
Underling: Sir, we lost a lot of money flowing in and out players at their whim, sir.
ZB: What happened to the Dubai matches? Surely, you got some money from there
I: No, Sir. Old dues.
ZB:(exasperated) is there no one in our cricket who makes money? Oh Come on!
Underling(brigthening up): Yes, sir. There are.
I: Eh?
ZB: Thats a good boy. Who?
U: The Players, sir
I: What?
ZB: What?
U: I mean, some of them got IPL contracts, Contracts with Australian states, ICL contracts etc
ZB: Thats really bright, my boy, really bright
I: (alarmed, he shouldnt let the underling hog credit, desparately tries to find a way to impress the cheif)
ZB: So, which of you can think of a way to extract that money from the players to our siphon.
I:(Thinks on his feet, and is on before the underling could move his lips)
Sir, I have a plan sir. Why dont we constitute a committee to inquire into our Australian tour and find scapegoats? We can fine the players, and take away part of their hard-earned cash from other sources
ZB: Brilliant, Ijaazat. You have repaid my trust. When can I expect my cut?


Gaurav Sethi said...

Zarda Beedi is one helluva name.

Mahek said...

Cancerous name that!

straight point said...

genuinely hilarious... its not easy to top the joke of what pcb has done... :)

raj said...

Thanks SP, NC and M.

Cancerous namee, ha ha. I am sure pakistani cricket lovers will agree that it is not just the name that is cancerous for their cricket :-)

rmblr said...