Rain, rain, don't go away.

John Hastings claims he hasn’t seen rains like this. Well, I have. Most of the week, that’s how it’s been in Goa, raining nuts, with some old score to settle with beach bums.

On Friday night I waited for four hours to board my flight out of Goa. Before that though, the flight had to land from Delhi. And for about an hour no flights landed. From Gate No. 2A to the bus was barely a few feet away – there was a canopy in place, ground staff with umbrellas, me in my running shoes. In a few seconds, I was dripping wet – it was Holi, buckets of water being hurled from all directions. The wind was wet, the rain was wet and I was wet. It was probably a good time for Wet, Wet, Wet to reunite.

Anything but cricket, buster. If Friday’s rain wasn’t rain enough, it went on to rain on Saturday. And that’s when John Hastings said, “My God I’ve never seen rain like this before”. As for the one-dayer, no matter what happens, it’ll be just another one-dayer. Which is why I say, if the game is scrapped, telecast the rain instead – Live Rain from Margao, Goa. That will be a first.

Play a truncated rain effected match – you could even brand the one-dayers as Rain Dears. Too dangerous, how about underarm bowling only, call it the Chappell Trophy. Anyone for a tennis ball, wouldn’t that be nice? At least all those spectators who line up, Fenied, will see some cricket.

Commentators can revel in informing us that the “outfield is wet”, “there is some moisture in the pitch”, “the ball will skid on to the bat” and “the ball will get wet and hard to grip for the spinners”.

For a change, one-day cricket will be funny. Staying with the same train of thought I propose one dayers in the Thar desert. After Teri maa ki, Bhajji will give us “Teri sookhi…”.

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