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Zamana badalgaya hai!

by Bored Guest

People are either for technology or against it. I’m for it, it creates more cricket fans. Among girls, especially.

This (in my imagination) is a typical conversation during a cricket game circa 1800’s:

“The match seems to be going marvellously, doesn’t it, dearie?” Belinda peers through her monocle to eye her friend Henrietta. Both are bedecked in straw hats and long print dresses.
“Oh, agreed. Lovely pitch, too, Gerard said.”
“Ah, is it?” Belinda feigns interest.
“I suppose so. It must be a special type of…dirt.” With a vague wave of her hand. Suddenly gasps. “Oh my—but that’s a run, isn’t it?”
Belinda glances at the field. “They do seem to be moving at any rate. ”
“Goodness! I would say that’s THREE solid runs, wouldn’t you?”
“Perhaps. Three, four—it’s all the same, isn’t it?”
“Oh rather. But my Gerard does so yearn for a glorious victory, being captain, after all. I suppose it’s like the Roman conquest. Men live for these things, you know.”
“Mmm bless them. Do pass me a crumpet.”
A good half hour spent munching in silence.
Suddenly Belinda snaps to attention. “Good heavens! It’s that delightful princely fellow.” –Fans herself “He’s come up to bat!”
“Oh, has he? He makes lovely scores, I’ve heard.”
“I’m ever so pleased! Now there’s something to watch! Do pass me a sandwich, darling.”

Fast forward to now..Facebook is what opens up cricket to most girls, I think. They can become "fans" of cricketers, get updates from Chris Gayle, & feel closer to a game that their brothers live for.

During a big match, you’ll typically get 50 or so updates from the 79 desi girls on your list.
Drama. Exclamation marks. Death threats. It’s all there.
Just as an example, real FB statuses from a recent match.
~UMAR AKMAL 50! Inshallah he’ll make 100! Noo I jinxed him!
And now I jinxed Afridi!-
OH hez out? Now I h8 him
SHOOT SOME1 ELSE GOT OUT!
Umar Gul now..he playd well once remember? Won us a match?
Oh ya but he gets under pressure easily

~We turned it off then we turned it on abhi. Hopefully 17 yr old will bowl everyone out, wudnt that be cool huh
Izz he 17 LOLL? He luks younga thn me.luks kittenlyk a LOL
NOOO KITTENS ARE CUTER, SANYA!
ur MOM izz cuter lolzzz xx
YESS OUR HOPES BE WITH YOU, AAMER!

~Mo Aamer bless u little baby! <3 & Saeed Ajmal too I guess
Y do they alwayz switch bowlerzz? Y cant the same guy bowl every tym?
Maybe it's a rule I dunno
WAT IS WRONG WID THESE RETARDED UMPIRES????!
AUGH WHAT IS EVEN HAPPENING? Why can’t Vettori just get out on purpose?

~Is game over?
Pata nahin Umar Gul paagal hai
Aw no baychara achchi English bolta hai
Why isn’t he bowling everyone out?
Cuzzz it’s hard (my brother said something bout new ball and pitch)

~Yeah yaar Pakistan lost! My dad told me I’m gonna kill something!
They wouldn’t have if the umpires hadn’t cheated I bet hmph
Yeah I guess……….what r umiores? The goal keepers or somethin?

by Husha Hum

8 comments:

Naked Cricket said...

Welcome on bored Husha!

I haven't travelled this much in a long time, bloody disoriented.

Nazia said...

Lovely Husha! Too good yaar!

Husha said...

Naked: Aw sucks, why are u travelling??

Nazia: Haha..girl, you KNOW it's the truth!

Anonymous said...

LOL! FB n cricket suck bigtime but with the kinda t20 games on its gotta b fb or tweet! YOU cant put more effort like writing a post or book or gawd knows wat

Husha said...

Um, I don't understand what u just said. Maybe cut back on the coffee?

achettup said...

"He makes lovely scores" - LOL

Hilarious post. Welcome Husha, keep up the great work!

pRAFs said...

top stuff husha!

Husha said...

Thanks