Bored Members - Guests | Media | White Bored | Interview | Bored Anthem - Songs | Boredwaani | Cartoons | Facebook | Twitter | Login

Zimbabwe win hearts then lose toss.

by Gaurav Sethi

Taibu got to bat and make runs. When that happens, it’s usually in a lost cause. If the Zim think tank got thinking, they’d bat Taibu low down. Far from runs, death threats.

The other problem, very early in the game it was known Brendan Taylor was not going to be man of the match. Zim floundered by sending him too early, he should have batted where Utseya batted – away from the bad morning breath of the new ball.

I am serious, this ex-captain of theirs, Utseya, should be rechristened Useless. He is a common noun. Prosper is his first name, and Useless his second. How on earth did that proper noun perch itself on him – I thereby call him Prosper Useless. And if a middle name be needed, call him Little – so from now on, he be PLU – Prosper little Useless; some folks will call him pretty useless no doubt, that’s up to them.

What does Useless do – he bats lower down than the extras, but he’s still not benched. Then he bowls, overbowls and any runs that are scored, are scored of him. When I saw his analysis I nearly dropped my mouse. It’s a good thing it was grounded anyway.

As for Coventry, he just doesn’t look good enough for a 199 again, why play him I ask. As for the 2Cs, here's BoredCricket in a previous game on twitter: Gng by their bowling analysis today, Chigumbura and Chibhabha are not pedigree. Bring on Chihuahua

Over to Lanka. That Dilshan guy is playing like it was 2009 again. What did they feed him, a friggin’ time machine. Clearly he’s plugged his razor into his bat – explains some of his beard like precision that has snuck into his batting.

Ok, that’s enough for a game neither you nor I give a toss for. Not a toss joke that, even though the toss was a joke. Win the toss, win the game. At least the Indian team has got somebody to blame. U2?

RT @Crownish: BAW Mendis and BMAJ Mendis. Tremendis!

No comments: