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A day in the life of Younis Khan

by Gaurav Sethi

While MoYo makes his mark in cricket, Younis makes the bed tea. Dazzling in an all-white kurta pajama (to remind him of the glory days), he wakes early, smile plastered on face, gotta be positive, and opens the door for the milkman.

Milkman: Younis Bhai, I have often wondered how you can be ever so smiling

Younis takes this remark personally, and walks away, as he often does with his cricket. But then again, as he often does in cricket, he returns smiling – this time, packed with a reply

Younis: Milkman bhai, I have often wondered if you learn your English from Goodness Gracious Me!

Milkman: 1000 apologies, Younis Bhai, it is from videos of Mind your Language…but tell me,Younis Bhai, how will you play for Pakistan again?

Cut to Ijaz Butt’s office

Butt: Younis, we just had a special screening of The Dark Knight for all the PCB – and you know what they’re saying – Younis is like that joker, he’s always smiling – he is evil!

Younis starts to sing Chris Rea’s You must be evil, all this while still smiling

Younis: You must be evil…

Butt as he often does, takes it personally, and accuses Younis

Butt: You are evil…how will you play for Pakistan again?

On his way back home, Younis picks some naans and mutton curry from the local restaurant. While doing so, the owner enters into conversation

Owner: Always so cheerful, always smiling – Younis, let me tell you this much – you must do something, burn Ijaz Butt effigies, retire from cricket, grow a beard, marry an Indian…but not smile

Younis throws the food in disgust and walks away, as he often does in cricket – only to return, smiling.

Owner: If you keep going away, how will you play for Pakistan again..

Younis Khan at home, watches as the kids play cricket – he asks to be included in a team

Kid: What, when the team if being made you always go away, then you want to play in the last minute

Kid2: Younis Chacha, forget playing with us, will you play for Pakistan again?

Younis smiles, and turns away...but as he turns away tears start to roll down…and it starts to rain. 

And this song starts to play: The rain falls down...on last year's man

And Younis fades to black.


Sujan Rao said...

"Younis starts to sing Chris Rea’s You must be evil, all this while still smiling."

Awesome NC.. awesome..

Gaurav Sethi said...

Thank you Sujan!

Bhaskar Khaund said...

This post wudda really made Younis smile !