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The Revenge Match: India pools resources

by Gaurav Sethi

At the swimming pool, the men in blue splash away in the shallow waters of the kids’ pool. MSD appears..

MSD: Well of course this is the perfect camouflage who will expect that we are about to have a revenge strategy meeting and of course thanks to Viru for calling it a revenge match because that is what it is and we don’t want to call it anything else

Viru: Obviously it is a revenge match…Oye salah *$#@

Gambhir splashes water at Viru

MSD: Well of course we must enjoy ourselves even when we play

Sachin: Then it better rain so we can splash water on the ground

Everybody goes nuts laughing like it were the most incredible joke which of course it was, Sachin cracked it – Bhajji nearly drowns himself laughing and then squirts out water at Sreesanth who mock slaps some more water on himself; Nehra laughs like a hyena, Kohli and Raina do some hanky-panky underwater and laugh like kids, only Munaf has that dazed look, as if not getting the joke. MSD has his best smile and pause on, after which he starts off again…

MSD: Of course I have a waterproof scorecard of that %#$@ game in 2007, 17th March it was I remember it like it was just 4 years ago

Viru: Obviously

MSD: I’m happy we have made some changes, Dada and Dravid are not in this team…

Sachin: Sourav top-scored in 2007

MSD: Well of course we will miss Dada’s experience on top and Dravid’s experience in the middle..

Yuvi: Areh bund kar, you are not on TV…

MSD: #$%^ I saw Shastri swimming towards us with a mike…

Shastri appears with a mike…

Shastri: MS, ready for the big match

MSD: Well of course

Shastri: I’ll just leave you with the boys to have a good time

Shastri spots some girls and gets yapping

Shastri: So girls ready for the big match…

MSD continues as if nothing has happened. Then again, Shastri had happened.

MSD: Well of course Uthappa is not there at No. 3 and even Sachin is not there…

Bhajji: Oye, what?? Sachin is here

MSD: Well of course I meant at No. 4 and that Agarkar he is not there thank…well of course Bhajji and I will look to make more runs

Yuvi: You can’t make less runs than zero

MSD (ignoring): Well of course it is always good to have Sreesanth who will be key to our revenge strategy…Sree have you learnt some bad language in Bangla

Sreesanth: Yes, my Bangla is very bad

Nobody reacts, possibly because Sree said it, but Sachin gets the joke, laughs and even repeats it…

Sachin (laughing) he said, for bad language in Bangla…my Bangla is very bad…hehehe

The team goes nuts laughing again…Sree goes nuts fuming, kissing his lockets, crossing his heart, flaring from the nostrils, mock slapping himself with water and so on

MSD: of course, Sree and Bhajji will lead the Revenge Talk while Viru and Sachin will let their bat do the talking…Gauti and Kohli can do a little of both…Gauti no shoulder please, Virat you can do shoulder and Yuvi will have a good time and of course I will decide what to do as per the condition of the match if the ball is doing a bit I will come in after Yusuf and…areh, where’s Yusuf

Munaf: He was missing Irfan so he called him up…Irfan had gone to practice and will be back in 30 minutes so Yusuf is holding on…

MSD: Well of course we will meet in the deep for our next session with Gary I see a lotta Banglas around here who could be spies

Sachin: C’mom MS, they are only kids

The team steps out of the shallow waters of the kids’ pool, to blend in MS and Bhajji have toy ducks, Sachin a Ferrari, Bhajji an inflatable doll. Munaf has a Barbie. Yuvi has a toy Yuvi.

(Revenge Conference to be continued, in the deep end of the pool)


Golandaaz said...

yuvi has a toy yuvi....!!

loved it

Govind Raj said...

Of course I have a waterproof scorecard of that %#$@ game in 2007, 17th March it was I remember it like it was just 4 years ago

Typical Dhoni !

crownish said...

Greg Chappell would've handed laminated scorecards to everyone. Yusuf Pathan would've borrowed Irfan's.