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Waiting For Godot (And His Retirement?): A play

by Bhaskar Khaund

ACT ONE

It's the year 2022. The Indian football team are closer to the FIFA WC than ever before , having risen from rank 146 to 142. Cricket is now a truly international sport with as many as 15 countries showing any interest in it and a staggering 13 countries with Test status. At ranks 13 and 12 , Zimbabwe and Bangladesh are showing great promise and causing significant upsets such as the time they lost to New Zealand. India at rank four - which means ahead of as many as nine teams ! - are a mega superpower and are  led by ViCo. As a mega superpower they have constantly innovated and evolved. For example , ViRue and GotIt now open the batting in each match across every format of the game : Test,ODI,T20,T10 and F5. (As opposed to the past when the occasional injury might have meant a third person filling in). 

But  hidden in the shadows cast by the brilliance of this team is trouble lurking in the form of a rift between ViRue and Vico. We come in during a particularly heated confrontation :

ViRue : " What is this rotation policy ? You're not a top"
ViCo : " No, but  i am there,remember ?  At the top....? "
ViRue : " The top belongs to GotIt and me. You've only got middle."
ViCo : " Top to you ?! Even if you made room , you'd only slash wildly"
ViRue : " Whatever,but this rotation policy makes no sense"
ViCo : " Look, you oldies are slow on the field"
ViRue : " You're slow with the over rate !"
ViCo : " And your overseas average is now under 10 !"
ViRue : " I'll make an ODI 200 against Mngwambamamba. Home series"
ViCo : " Mouthing tall claims ! At least you can't put a foot in it. No footwork"
ViRue : " BiggBosST ! He's being rude to me again ! "

BiggBosST is the greatest batsman ever of the modern era. Has been for a while. He has 199 international centuries to his name. And has had for a while. The 200th one has eluded him for over a year now though.

BosST (irritated) : " Can you guys leave me alone please ? I am doing my visualization exercises"
ViCo (deferentially) : " But of course , BosST bhai  ! The 200th , huh...wow. Er , BosST bhai , you know i was thinking , ..er , i mean, any retirement plans after getting that one...? i mean ,of course...." 

THE AUDIENCE MOB THE STAGE AND LYNCH ViCo

END OF PLAY 


EPILOGUE 
ViRue (pleased aside) : " So , captaincy at  last ...!"
Distracted by sudden announcement on TV 
"Ravingmad Jadeja was appointed captain of the Indian  team today...." 

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