More »
This story is inspired by Amit Mishra's run out on 8th May, 2014.
Before Walter Mitty’s secret world and Mungerilal’s dreamscapes, there was Amit Mishra. A stationery object, unmoved by the futility of movement, a master of the Zen of Pause. An inspiration for artists, among others, U2’s Running to stand still.
In a way, Gauti was pleased, his friend was doing well enough to be his companion on tour. Four years after his Test debut, Amit Mishra would make his. Between them, 171 runs and 7 wickets.
Before Walter Mitty’s secret world and Mungerilal’s dreamscapes, there was Amit Mishra. A stationery object, unmoved by the futility of movement, a master of the Zen of Pause. An inspiration for artists, among others, U2’s Running to stand still.
Amit Mishra was not always like this. He was far worse. A
love for sport was discovered at an early age by accident. When he was yawning
at the boundary and a fierce flat-hit lodged itself in his outstretched arms.
Amit Mishra was cranky, the ball had broken his breathing patterns – he had
reluctantly mastered the merits of breathe-in, breathe out, during yoga. His
favourite Asan, the Shavasana (Corpse-asan) where you lie flat on your back, arms outstretched, doing nothing. As per the yoga teacher, Shavasana
was a wind-down after the somewhat more rigorous Surya
Namaskars.
Not for Amit Mishra. He wanted to start class with the Shavasana. The only time he showed any
enthusiasm was when he eyed the mat with a sparkle in his eye; soon to be
doused. 'Flat on the mat' was a rap song, Ma’ Odumbe, his Kenyan friend would
sing for him. Of course, his full name was Maurice Odumbe, but Amit’s love for
minimum-effort drove him to circumcise his name.
When everyone’s idea of a beach holiday was Goa, Amit Mishra’s
was The Dead Sea. Fearing his family would bully him into water sports, Mishra
stuck pictures of Thai beaches on the Jordan brochure. Once there, Amit Mishra even dragged his yoga
mat into The Dead Sea attempting the Shavasana.
He wrote in his diary that day, “Shavasana
& Dead Sea, these are a few of my favourite”
When the family posed for photographs, he
demanded deadpan expressions. This joke was lost on everyone including Amit
Mishra. However, deadpan was one of his favourite expressions – his buddy,
Gauti, had used it whilst ordering pan fried pizzas, saying, you guessed it, “Deadpan
pizza for Amit Mishra”. At first he
sulked, but when Gauti told him it was a joke, he laughed a tad, fast retiring
to his stupor.
There was also a misplaced love for the shot put. What drew
Amit Mishra to the sport first were the confines of the circle – yeah, I can
stay there all day, he muttered. The tough part was lifting the shot and then
hurling it. He asked if he could perch on the shot and be hurled instead? To
his credit, he was the only enlisted-athlete (forgive the expression) who was
never-fouled for leaving the circle. What
endeared him to the shot put even more was the knowledge that it had been part
of the modern Olympics since 1896 – he loved all things old, as in his mind he
equated them to immobility.
His friendship with Gauti meant cricket would soon be thrust
upon him. Gauti loved to bat, but even more than that, he loved to smash
spinners – especially left arm spinners. For a while, he made Amit Mishra bowl
left arm spin. That backfired. The ball would invariably be bowled towards mid on - the
next best thing, Gauti taught him leg spin. Gauti was ambitious, and wanted to
smash other deliveries too, the googly and the full toss were added. And post match interviews.
It took a few dismissals for Gauti to realise he had created
a Mishraenstein. Gauti asked him to concentrate on the full toss. But such was
his friend’s accidental guile, the googly would come out instead.
In a way, Gauti was pleased, his friend was doing well enough to be his companion on tour. Four years after his Test debut, Amit Mishra would make his. Between them, 171 runs and 7 wickets.
Two years’ later on Independence Day, Amit Mishra combined his love for
flying kites, shot put and flighting the ball by doing this:
From 2008-2010, he was chasing Harbhajan Singh. Seeing as it
was becoming increasingly difficult to replace him, he decided to become him.
 |
| Not one to be his own man, the IPL brought him new opportunities, to be someone else's man. |
In spite of himself, Amit Mishra has
represented India, Deccan Chargers, Delhi Daredevils, Haryana, India
Blue, Sunrisers Hyderabad. So much flux and changing of jerseys has scarred
Amit Mishra. He still turns up for SRH matches in DD jerseys. However, he has
stopped turning up for DD matches. The change in jerseys and logo was the last
straw. A traditionalist, Amit Mishra once said, in the long run, it’s
the short run that counts.
However plausible this might sound, this is a work of
fiction.
