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Showing posts with label Eden Gardens. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Eden Gardens. Show all posts
After Wankhede, SRK wants to be banned from Eden Gardens
The Wankhede ban on Shah Rukh Khan has been lifted. While the Mumbai Cricket Association (MCA) did not give any specific reasons for this, it's learnt that the Bombaiya in SRK prevailed. SRK has often spoken of his loyalties split between Mumbai and Kolkata when it came to the Indian Premier League (IPL). While he sees himself as the owner and ultimate fanboy of the Kolkata Knight Riders (KKR), he also thinks of himself as "Bollywood ka badsha".
"I was not a very good actor that fateful summer's night in May, 2012. If I had hammed some more, I'm sure the MCA would not have banned me. Instead, I was trying to be earnest and protective of my children. They did not recognise this side of me. Even that guard (who later swore to be a diehard SRK fan) did not think it was me. He behaved with me in such a high-handed manner. I recall him telling me, 'Don't give me the SRK flop show, only star airs work here in Bombay'. At first I thought he was talking complete rubbish and abused him - that too without any dialoguebazi - just straight from the hip MC BC that we speak - not what you hear in the films."
Vikas Dalvi, the security guard in question, said he'd prefer to forget the NASA scientist-wallah SRK. "For me, Swades was a crap film. Too much reality, that's not how Bollywood is. And when he said he'll hit me with a hockey stick it reminded me of Chakde! India - another film for pseudo intellectuals who have tried their best to stop SRK from overacting - if I wanted to just see good acting, I won't pay so much money. For poor people like me, the more money I pay, the more acting I want to see."
SRK regretted missing out on two seasons at the Wankhede where he could have sat shoulder to shoulder with the Ambanis and the Tendulkars. While the Ambanis were unavailable for comment, Sachin Tendulkar said he was not aware of the SRK ban and would prefer not to comment without knowing the whole truth. "Anyway, if the ban has been lifted, there's nothing left to be said," he added.
The actor says he does not want to rest on his laurels and hopes to be banned from the Feroz Shah Kotla (Delhi was his home before Mumbai) and Eden Gardens. "The Kotla is such a third class stadium and the Delhi Daredevils (DD) are such a third class team, but because of my commitments to KKR, I have to go and watch these one-sided crappy matches. Gambhir has such a bloodlust when it comes to DD, we all know he will beat them every time, especially in Delhi, no matter what. Also when I'm in Delhi, all those pile-ons from St Columba's and Hansraj come out of the woodwork... avoiding them is becoming serious hard work... and yeah, my in-laws are here also."
As for the Eden Gardens, SRK says that being banned from there is the ultimate challenge. "If you would've noticed, especially in the World Cup quarter-finals in 1996, Eden has very low standards. The crowds are the ultimate badmash. For me to be banned from there, maybe I'll have to be at my best behaviour ever. Then I suspect it will not be up to the low standards of the stadium. Mamatadi is very protective of me and even if I am banned, I'm sure she will blame a cartoonist and ban the poor artist instead."
When asked what the next big thing for him in the IPL was, SRK was non-committal at first but then took a deep breath and said since he'd already been banned protecting his daughter, Suhana, he'd now love to be banned shielding his youngest son, AbRam. But where does that leave his elder son, Aryan? "He's a big boy now, he should be looking to have his own Wankhede experience!"
The Wankhede security guard, Dalvi, confessed that if Aamir Khan ever found himself in a similar situation as SRK, he had full faith the actor would give his most OTP Satyamev Jayate performance. "That's why Aamir will never be banned, he gives you full value for your money. Before brandishing a stick at him, I'll be drowning in a pool of my tears", he added choking on his own words.
(However plausible this might sound, this is largely a work of fiction.)
First published here
Whistle Blower
My team has lost a crucial match recently and are about to play a virtual quarter final match against a team at their home ground.
In the previous match my batsmen struggled to cope with the surface and posted a below par score and were completely outplayed by the opposition (The average 1st inning score over 6 matches in this tournament at the venue has been 130).
For the above said virtual quarter final match the home team has a very formidable record at their home venue and have even beaten the best team of the tournament as well quite easily ( Average 1st inning score over 5 matches in this tournament at the venue has been 131)
My team’s best chance to win the game is to play on a flat wicket as the opposition doesn’t have the fire power to match my team in such conditions.
I am heading the organisation that runs the tournament as well where I can influence many decisions and can get away with it as there is no transparency.
My team is the defending champion and not making the top 3 of the tournament will have a huge revenue loss for me and not making the top 4 would be seen as an under achievement for my team as well.
Next on My agenda: Shifting a couple of playoff games from the home ground of the best team in the tournament which will make life a lot easier for my team.
Yours truly:
NS
and D*F IPL
eight centuries in an innings...
just a question...
is it the first time eight centuries were scored in an innings...?
four by batting side... four by bowling side...
p.s.: suddenly all the talk of sa bowlers making pitch redundant seems to have evaporated in thin air...
Quote Unquote
“I got a call from one of the BCCI officials requesting me to prepare a turning track as per the wish of the team management. However, I have clearly told him that I want an official communication, like an e-mail, stating what should be the nature of the wicket. Also, I don’t know how we can change the nature of the strip overnight,”
--
“They (BCCI officials) called me today, requesting I come up with a pitch that will suit the Indian brand of cricket. Test cricket is meant to be played on good wickets. Can anyone please define what exactly is a turner? If you want the ball to turn square from day one, why do you need a curator? The Eden Gardens wicket will have even bounce and decent carry. Spinners will come into play as the match meanders along,”
--
“I haven’t got any instructions from the BCCI. I’m trying to prepare what should be an ideal Test wicket,"
--
"I have not received any instruction from the Board about preparation of the wicket at Eden Gardens,"
--
“There has been no official instruction. I was talking to some BCCI officials and it appeared that the team management wants a spinning wicket, but that was it.”
--
Question - How difficult is it for a hack to report a statement ad verbatim without editorializing it?
Question - What was VVS Laxman thinking when he said that there was a dearth of spinners in India? Our cadre of cricket journalists will put any spinner to shame!
Look, Karthik did not stop Gambhir's hundred and fifty.
The cynics will say he tried, what with that four through covers. The optimists will say, it was the Lankan misfield. Anyway, 3 runs to win, 4 runs for Gambhir’s 150; good for him he had the strike – and he stuck, 4, 150 for Gambhir. You can’t blame Karthik for everything. One stumping and a 19 not out, he even lifted Gambhir, half mast, but he’s only a little man.
A match made in heaven or hell?
Personally it’s been a rough wedding season. Looking back it’s like I’ve played 3 tests, 7 ODIs and an IPL in a few weeks. The ODIs are mostly like the wedding day (usually dry, I’m done with Car-o-bars, just come in late, leave early); while the tests and IPL are like the wedding receptions or the sangeet – it’s either a mindless binge or one of those rare days of joyous excess that make you want to pledge your life to the virtues of booze.
Bummers are games where India's slayed, and you’re so badly hung over the following day, because something is happening here, but you don't know what it is, do you Mister Jones?
There was one such sangeet in March, 1996. India played Lanka at Eden. Party at my place, watched very little of India’s innings, thankfully. One man in black claimed he was in mourning; most guys had the blues, they drank way too much. Bored Member Bhaskar Khaund was a notorious bartender; drinks flew over the cuckoo’s nest.
Today, I revisited that scorecard. Apart from the obvious pointers, only Sachin, Sanath and Murali remain from the 96 squads; I look at the Indian numbers – both Azhar and Jaddu didn’t score; Azhar was captain, Jaddu bowled 5 overs for 31, Srinath who had a three for bowled only 7. It’s crazy but once the mind goes strange places, there’s no stopping it. Unless you care to remember Aravinda walking down thumping them over mid on.
Five days of creation
by Naked Cricket
On the first day
God said let there toss
And there was toss
But Ganguly didn’t turn up in time
On the second day
God said let there be wickets
And there was wickets
And McGrath turned up to bowl
On the third day
God said let there be runs
And there was runs
And VVS turned up to bat
On the fourth day
God said let there be more runs
And there was more runs
And God separated the runs from the wickets
And the wickets from the runs
On the fifth day
God said let there be result
And there was result
And Bhajji turned up to bowl.
Retro Scoresheet
Early Cricket Watching Memories
By VM
A few days ago, for some strange reason, I tried to remember the first cricket match I watched. I was rather surprised that it took me some time to sort things out of a muddle of memories. The early matches - in which I was trying to understand the rules - I recall only in bits and pieces. In fact in such pieces that remember only one of the two teams that played the match –
The next memory that came to my mind was the ’96 World Cup semi-final between
So I ask you this. Is there a particular match that comes to your mind when you think of the first ever cricket match you saw? Are there any fuzzy memories? Any funny memories? What was your first full fledged tournament? What made you watch further?
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