Bored Members - Guests | Media | White Bored | Interview | Bored Anthem - Songs | Boredwaani | Cartoons | Facebook | Twitter | Login
Showing posts with label controversy. Show all posts
Showing posts with label controversy. Show all posts

Sorry to have kept you waiting, Hardik

by Gaurav Sethi


Welcome back, Hardik.

Even if you weren’t 1/10th of the cricketer, even if you could just catch and field and were a bits and pieces all-rounder, it would be good to see you back.

But you are more than that. You flew in, and then you flew - what a catch that was. There is something about you, who knows, maybe even you don’t know yet what it is, but there are those that do.

Which is why, after Kohli, Rohit, MS, Bumrah, your name was inked in indelible marker to make that formidable India XI for the World Cup. 

Yet your name went missing. Just as every voice that could have made a difference went missing.

It took Rahul Dravid to speak up for you, in an equal measure of sanity and understanding.

And with that, somehow, things appear to have been sorted for now at least.

Perhaps a lesson for all cricketers: do not expect much from the administration. It’s beyond them. It reflects in the way the BCCI has been run, and far worse, how it fails to be run - with the added discomfort of a prop called the Committee of Administrators (CoA).

Were things better in Srini’s time? 

So, you’re back, Hardik. How does it feel? Like you got out of jail?

No, you don’t have to answer that. You don’t have to answer anything. 

You are not answerable. 

That’s what they wanted, and that’s what they should get.

Hardik Pandya has gone missing. In finding Hardik Pandya, again, India has lost him.

How hard we try and alter people. To make them suit our definition of what they should be like.

Great, Hardik Pandya is palatable now. You will see him as we have seen him for a while, pokerfaced, answering questions, so deadpan, when it’s only Manjrekar in the post-match.

Somehow, Manjrekar has drilled Pandya far more than Karan Johar ever did - in each interview, he has probed, skilfully, trying to eek something out, something about the other Hardik Pandya.

But that was cricket. Hardik Pandya was on his guard. His eyes still, almost lifeless, his demeanour almost solemn, as if Manjrekar was singing a dirge. 

That dirge which Karn Johar sang, camouflaged with a sexual surge.

Johar was his friend, buddy, this was Bollywood, not cricket; Hardik Pandya wasn’t a cricketer, he was so much more, Black Elvis had just entered the building.

Part 2

A while back, Hardik Pandya posted a video on twitter of his homecoming from an overseas’ tour - he surprised his father in the middle of the night, waking him up. A stunned father hugs his son, frantically. 

It’s a dramatic video. Hardik Pandya was dramatic. His father seemed dramatic too.

There are bits and pieces that people have seen of the Karan Johar interview. There seems to be plenty of hearsay too. I did watch the video, a few days after it went on air.

If anything, it was largely tactless of the two cricketers. Even naïve. Such a rarity on air, these days. Everyone is tutored enough to be the next Sushmita Sen.

These two, they would’ve made it beyond the swimsuit round. But not much further.

Part 3

On January 28, 2019, on his return, Hardik Pandya bowled his full quota of ten overs. In 42 innings so far, this was the 11th occasion that he had bowled all 10 overs. Two caught keeper dismissals, Pandya was pitching it up.

That not even player of the match, Mohammed Shami bowled his full quota, was a sign from the captain – we are behind you, Pandya.  


Part 4

It’s way too early to look at Pandya’s numbers and make sense of him as a cricketer. But in him, is India’s genuine search for a cricketing all-rounder. That’s how serious Indian cricket is of Hardik Pandya.

That Kapil Dev’s name continues to be thrown in tandem with his name, is not an accident.

In 11 Tests so far, Hardik Pandya already has a Test century and a five-for. He scored a Test 50 on debut, a Test century in his third Test. His 112 off 96 balls earned him Man of the match.

His match-turning spell of 5/28 at Nottingham was sealed with a run a ball 50. But those are just numbers. And with Pandya, they will, for a while, continue to be only a small part of the story.

Just as, India invested long term in Rohit Sharma, and is now served tons for fun, there is a deep squinting far-away look at the horizon for this 25 year old’s India future.

After Hardik Pandya sat on that Coffee Show, much of that promise was being ripped into – it may have been politically incorrect, even foolish, but none of that was, arguably, to do with cricket.

That he was on the show as a cricketer was not by accident either. He was not there as the painter who reds the town. But Johar’s batteries were all charged for ‘Gimme Red’.

What else do you expect on a Johar show? It’s not by accident either that a Bollywood icon claims to be a virgin on his show.

Anything goes. It’s just that these two cricketers, didn’t know better. It’s not as if either Pandya or KL Rahul will become saints after this incident; but don’t be surprised if they
sound like car nerds in their next interview-shoot. Maybe they will do an entire interview where car will be a metaphor for something else. With Queen’s ‘I’m in love with my car’ playing alongside.

Part 5

Here are two hugely successful guys in their mid-20s, with 10-12 years best of making the most of their gifts and talents.

Let’s back them. Let’s be their strength. If you love the game, know what it is that makes you love it – it is players like Hardik and Rahul that make those repeated curtain calls to the clamouring of crowds, after those mighty sixes – they are to the manor born, they are to the IPL born.

Whichever team they go to, and by the looks of it, Pandya won’t go far from the Mumbai Indians, will be enrichened by their funky town cricket.

They are, by virtue of their skills, flair, approach to the game, a toast to the game.

Not just the IPL, but who knows, to all formats. Which is why, in spite of Rahul’s repeated and often baffling failures, one Test series after the other, there is that glimmer of hope that he will come good. He too is a long term investment.

Part 6

But if this is how BCCI treats their long term investments, why grudge the bulls and the bears? In the aftermath of the Johar episode, the BCCI had pulled out of the Pandya-Rahul investment. It is a matter of both shame and regret. Which is where the Supreme Court and the CoA come in. The Pandya-Rahul affair is a pointer to a stinkier mess. It didn’t work well before the changes. But it’s far worse now. By tying the BCCI arms and legs, it’s Indian cricket that’s being kicked in the gut.

Part 7

Hardik Pandya was born on October, 11. Under the same sign as Sehwag and Gambhir. With a strange balance, comes an even stranger outspoken word and world way.

Try to curtail him at your own peril. And if you do, don’t be surprised that you may do more harm than help. Nurture him. He could win you more than the odd cup. More than the world?

Part 8

This should have been written much earlier. But it did seem almost premature to write it before Hardik Pandya’s return to the Indian side. Personally, I did feel bad for him, almost anxious for his career. In a way, the thought that we may not see Pandya play again for India, made me value him more than I ever had before.

Let’s lighten up now. Here’s to Pandya going red in the head for the fourth ODI.

First published here

Read more...

WTF did Virat Kohli say?

by Gaurav Sethi

An Indian cricketer is chatting with two Murdoch University employees when a journalist starts to abuse him. How do you think the cricketer would have reacted? Yeah, poor journo alright.
An Indian journalist is chatting with two Murdoch University employees when a cricketer starts to abuse him. The journalist does not react. Later, the cricketer's apology is sent via another journalist citing mistaken identity.
The journalist is Jasvinder Sidhu. Did Virat Kohli think it was Navjot? Kohli can claim it was Mitchell Johnson, still not on - this was not a sledge on the cricket field aimed at a cricketer or a random spectator in the crowd, this was an unprovoked abuse at a journalist. Kohli is not on vacation, he is representing India (though some will claim he represents BCCI, Nike, Star Sports) - in that case, is it on? For that, we must delve deep into the dressing room - BCCI jokes' culture - and their understanding of the BCCI culture that anything goes. But if Kohli is under the impression that he is representing India, it does warrant a rethink, young man.
And what inappropriate abuse - abusing a journalist of a leading English daily in Hindi. Thereby forcing the abused journalist to report (in his leading English daily) these very Hindi expletives - though thankfully with ast****s in place. "Despite the distance, I could hear invectives like g***u and be***hod pretty clearly." We must investigate what those ***s are, but then, this site too belongs to a leading English, never mind.
Swearing Solutions
Glad to report, Kohli did break into English abuse - "Huffing and puffing, Kohli said, "Yes, you ba****d. You are here also". C'mon, why the ****s here, bastard is acceptable, no? But this last part, very dicey, especially if aimed at an Aussie cricketer who could misconstrue it as a racial slur - "Before I could gather myself, he walked towards the dressing room with his kit in hand, murmuring continuously, "m** ki c***." Not for a moment did I think disallowing WAGs and aiyas was a good idea. They're necessary to iron out wrinkled... and crumpled trousers.
Appears it's crucial to address the vice captaincy here - Kohli is still not the ODI skip, and this abuse was not in his capacity as Test captain. Is it becoming of a vice captain? What standards, if any do vice captains have? Or will Kohli just grow into the job and start mouthing platitudes instead of be***hoditudes?
For starters, Kohli should have, and still can, personally apologise to Sidhu. And while doing so, avoid any Hindi abuse and that one English word in particular, bastard, even in jest. You are not mates. This could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship but there is much work to be done.
F***er, this is for you, Virat.
After apologising in person, allow Sidhu to abuse you. Encourage him to wag and point his fingers as you did to him. Also, don't force him to use the same filthy language, if idiot, fool, bad boy, loser, big lips, obnoxious, depraved, national disgrace, filthy tongue, are more his scene, so be it. Hear him out, as he did, you.
Grant him an interview in private. Sure, get Shastri's ok on this, don't be surprised, Shastri could be the first to suggest this. Apologise to him in the interview. Tell him you thought it was Navjot, it works for most people who abuse someone called Sidhu.
Do a shinny, happy people photo-shoot with him and those two Murdoch University employees. Who knows, maybe even a story, how the two were basking in the mistaken glory of being abused by Virat Kohli.You love press conferences, do another one. Speak from the heart as you often do, it's not half as much fun as the abuse, and you'll leave the journalists asking for less.

First published in daily O

Read more...

Asad Rauf - Leena Kapoor Affair

by Gaurav Sethi

click on cartoon to enlarge

Read more...

Sydney 2012: What Controversy Would You Like To See?

by achettup

2008, meh. Shoddy umpiring, batsman standing after edging, the odd racist ('allegedly') remark, match refs blah blah.. Happens just about every game. And they called that controversial. No, we think the bar can be set a lot higher in 2012, which of these inflammable events would you like to see at Sydney during this year's New Year Test?
  1. Bhajji and Symonds spotted sitting together in the crowd, incessantly booing Clarke and Sachin
  2. Cricket Australia springs a surprise and brings in a special DRS (dirty rotten scoundrel) umpire - STEVE BUCKNOR!
  3. Sunil Gavaskar becomes the first ex-international cricketer to streak the SCG during the post match ceremony, all the while screaming "Mind you, the balls might be in the right place, but they still have to be put away." He is banned and never allowed back during the post match ceremony.. oh, wait, that happened last time too, right?
  4. Sachin is batting on 98*, plays his trademark tuck to square leg and hairs off for a double. But as he leaves the bowler's end, Peter Siddle pulls Sach's pants down and starts laughing, Sachin wallops him with his bat thereby improving Siddle's appearance ten-fold and starts to pull his trousers up just as Laxman runs past him (thinking he's completing the second run) to the bowler's crease. The stumps are broken at the batsman's end and Sachin is run out on 99.
  5. India crash to a humiliating innings defeat and 400 runs, and a very drunk Rahul Dravid says in a post match interview "Well all I can say is only one team was playing with the right spirits in the match."
  6. A sensationalist tabloid trash newspaper, whose initials might or might not be TOI, contracts Nasser Hussain to cover the Test while getting a few jibes in at the Aussies. Hussain pokes fun of Warner and Ponting's fielding, calling them "a pair of Asses". He then strikes that out and replaces it with "pack of wild donkeys". He then strikes out donkeys and replaces it with (teri don ki *wink wink*).
  7. Everybody shuts up about the decision review system. ITS LIKE IT DOESN'T EXIST.
  8. Ishant Sharma gets a plain to see inside edge onto his pads which pops up for an easy catch to short leg. Erasmus appears unmoved by Cowan's appeal for the edge and catch, and Ishant screams "Karma is a bitch Eddie", just as Erasmus rules him out LBW.
  9. Dhoni refuses to play unless the BCCI sends in a charter flight to evict three certain Indians (and their stupid tweeting phones) in the crowd who have followed the team's losses in England and brought their (bad) luck to Australia too. Rohit Sharma immediately says he's mentally prepared to keep wickets too, so the BCCI declines. It is to be the costliest error they have made in a while.

Read more...

How Azhar & Kambli Do Their Match Fixing:

by Gaurav Sethi






hat tip @fakingnews for that Kambli gf tweet

Read more...

Meet BCCI's Embedded Commentators

by Gaurav Sethi

<iframe width="425" height="349" src="http://www.ravishastri/sunilgavaskar/bcci.com/embed/9S8Op2kSkbk" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe>

Read more...

Same old Dhoni, but as always, the difference is Tendulkar.

by bored cricket crazy indians

Once upon an IPL (see how MSD waits for that precise moment when Shukla steps past the crease, only then does he instruct his boys to knock the bails off)



Now (Oh well, it's that Bell not-out run-out again, not much of a difference is there?)




If Sachin was in MSD's IPL team, who knows, Shukla too may have returned, to face the last ball of the innings. 


Thanks to Leela at Maidenbowling for the MSD-IPL video

Read more...

Disgraceful England Deserve Censure But The ICC Thanks Them

by achettup

Ian Bell is a good batsman. Thats all he is. He is not an umpire. He is not a match referee. He is not the sole authority on the cricket field. At some point yesterday he decided he was all of these things. He assumed that the ball was dead. Him and him alone. His batting partner, Eoin Morgan didn't. The bowler didn't. The fielder who had thrown the ball in didn't. And the umpires didn't. Yet in a supreme display of arrogance, Bell trotted over to his batting partner, who looked most uncomfortable about the whole affair since he had just put his bat in the crease after attempting to warn Bell, and knew something unfortunate was about to occur.

Make no mistake, the error was Bell's and Bell's alone, nothing but sheer stupidity. But it gets worse from here. Ignore the indignation from the English, who almost drowned twitter out with calls for Dhoni's head for, well, doing the correct thing. As the umpires asked Dhoni if he wanted to uphold the appeal, they also turned to the English batsmen and asked them to wait on the field until a decision had been made. Bell's arrogance took to the fore again and he marched off, seemingly as oblivious to their request as he seemed to the entire run out fiasco. Note that even at that point the umpires had still not called Tea, it was Bell who took it upon himself to declare the session over. Bell was actually stopped just before he left the ground to his obvious disgust by the fourth umpire, who politely reminded him that the session had not in fact officially ended.

For such blatant disregard to an umpire's authority, a player has already been penalized in this test, too bad he isn't English though, because they are praised for this sort of behavior. Already in this test we've seen Graeme Swann kick the stumps in disgust at his own performance, and despite being his second offence in under three months, escape with a reprimand. "Look here you jolly old fellow, we love your witty banter on twitter, but you can't go around kicking the stumps when you feel like it. Just quickly apologize for it and we'll sweep it under the carpet."

The most petulant and a serial offender in the English side, much like his father before him, and rewarded with T20 captaincy - this is the same bowler who is the only international cricketer to have conceded 6 sixes in an over in a T20 match - Stuart Broad, took it upon himself to step into his father's shoes and check if VVS Laxman had applied Vaseline to his bat. The English seem to think this sort of behavior is amusing, its a bit like throwing jelly beans on the pitch, its all in good fun when you're not at the receiving end. Insinuate that an Englishman might be a cheat and you'll get the response the Pakistani team received after their counter accusations during the spot fixing brouhaha.

Andrew Strauss and Andy Flower chose to approach Dhoni during the Tea interval and ask him to reconsider his appeal. This has been described as "most unorthodox" but the more simple way of describing it is that it was way out of line. You cannot go to the opposition and ask them to play in a manner that suits your players after your very players are solely responsible for an incident because of their stupidity, and especially not after the mob you're leading onto the field has already acted so disgracefully. The trouble is, nobody seems to be telling England that they're behaving terribly. Oh no, quite the opposite.

Here's how Haroon Lorgat, CEO of the ICC, described the incident and the conduct of the players. "Absolute credit must go to Team India, the England team and the match officials - Ranjan Madugalle, Asad Rauf and Marais Erasmus as well as the off-field umpires Billy Bowden and Tim Robinson - for the superb way that they all handled a tricky situation. While the initial appeal and umpire decision may have been acceptable to the letter of the law, the decision by India captain M S Dhoni and his team -as well as the Team India coaching staff - to withdraw the appeal shows great maturity. To see players and officials uphold the Great Spirit of cricket, which has underpinned the game for more than a century, is very special. I am indeed grateful for the way that the teams and match officials handled what was clearly a difficult situation and their behaviour reflects well on everyone."

I'm not sure what Lorgat is smoking, but he did get a few things right, so it might not be the best stuff out there on the market. The umpires and the Indian Team deserve praise. Don't discount the role of the umpires here, they could have chosen to act as heavy handed as Daryl Hair did at the Oval during Inzimam's protest and taken the incident to a whole different level. Madugalle's lenient reprimand to Swann and his overlooking Broad's distasteful accusation, doesn't deserve credit. And England's conduct definitely does not either. The "Great Spirit of Cricket" shouldn't win any accolades today, it was in fact insulted because it asks players to play fair, within the rules and to respect umpires. But more so because it promotes equality and equal treatment to players, and by all indications from the ICC's statement, equality seems to be used rather judiciously, and certainly selectively.

Read more...

If that Ian Bell runout was bad, take a look at this video

by bored cricket crazy indians



The Star Cricket videos have been ripped off youtube, all you have is this.

Read more...

Bhajji raises the bar

by Gaurav Sethi

click on cartoon



For background, go here

Read more...

Harbhajan Singh and MS Dhoni 'Make it Large' Spoof Ad Controversy. (and us)

by bored cricket crazy indians

First came Bhajji's 'Make it large' ad for Royal Stag. Loads of production value and adspeak, they really should have spoofed it themselves before McDowells and MSD came along. Oh right, we spoofed it here, on X'mas eve last year.






‘Have I made it large?’ ‘Have I made it large?’ ‘Have I made it large?’

Pace up and down, parrot that line, what?

I bet Bhajji must have laughed his ass off when he did it, who knows, Bhajji and MS may have laughed about it too. What’s not to laugh?

I find the Royal Stag ads funny too– they’re soaked in sincerity (and of course whiskey, with that potent ‘Have I made it large?’ sly surrogate advertising push, the boys at Seagram’s and the agency had it all figured out.)

I'll say it again, it’s incredible someone’s taken so long to spoof the ads, this is easily the 3-4th Make it Large ad campaign. (Ok, ok, we did it)

Before I watched the ad, I heard about it on twitter, and saw some news reports.

What’s put everyone off is the portrayal of Bhajji’s dad who is no more. That was my first take, and pretty much what bored members SP and K had to say too.

By now you know, Bhajji’s Mom has served Mallaya’s UB group with a legal notice, and a scrap the ad in 3 days ultimatum.

Next? They should go spoof Gambhir’s Make it Large ad.

Read more...

technically speaking...

by straight point

according to this report on cricinfo... rick parry, the chairman of uk commission, set up for gambling-related corruption believes there is not enough evidence against mazhar majeed, this was further proved by majeed being granted swift bail...

rick parry observes...

"I don't think [the case] has any evidence at all," said Parry. "Unless the News of the World placed a bet - which would be highly unlikely because in so doing they would have carried out a criminal act - then there doesn't appear to be any betting activity at all associated with these particular allegations. It places the ball, to pardon the pun, squarely back into the hands of the cricket authorities."

NOTW cannot be charged as they did not place the bet... their lawyers would have taken care of that prior to the sting...

by the same token as the bet was not placed... this weakens the charges against majeed to the extent that it can't be proved in court...

so correct me if i am wrong...

as no bet was placed... what have asif, aamir and butt been suspended for...? for bowling no balls...?

since when has bowling a no-ball attracted suspension...?

Read more...

Shahid Afridi's plea to seniors works

by Gaurav Sethi

I get the feeling our senior players will listen to me
and return to play for Pakistan cricket very soon...

Read more...

what made tharoor resign...

by straight point

Read more...

tharoor and modi flims present...

by straight point

Read more...