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Showing posts with label Delhi Daredevils v Mumbai Indians. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Delhi Daredevils v Mumbai Indians. Show all posts
Jatman's hands are aching
Place - Jatman's house
Time - The day before the MI match at Mumbai
Jatman comes home shouting for his mom asking her to heat a bucketful of water.
"What happened Puttar? Why do you need a full bucket of hot water for relaxing your fingers? Won't a small bowl suffice?"
"No Maa! My entire hand is paining after all the exercise."
"Why? Did you bat for more than 4 balls at the nets today? Those DDDs really overwork you. My poor kid! Should I call up Gouti to stop treating you like an ordinary batter? Wo meri baat jaroor sunega."
"It's not like that Ma! I batted only 2 balls as usual. But later I had to massage Gouti's hamstring, which unlike RCB, doesn't wilt under pressure."
"But why didn't Gouti ask the physio to attend to him?"
"DDD pays pittance to even its star players. The physio is paid peanuts so he refuses to do overtime as it was past 5.30 p.m. So I had to do the job "
"But how much is he paid?"
"I told you no Ma, peanuts! 1kg every day."
"Ohh puttar you must be really tired."
"Maa, it doesn't end there." Jatman said with tears in his eyes "Later I had to go to Sachin Paaji's place."
"Why did you go to meet Sachin?"
"You see, we are playing a match against him tomorrow. I was sent by the coach to plead and beg with him to let us win the match."
"And what happened there?"
"As I entered the room I saw Sachin sleeping on his bed and Anil bhai sitting near his pillow. He was there to plead for his team's cause as well."
"So if Anil beta was sitting there puttar, how could you beg and plead with Sachin in his presence?"
"Arre Maa, I always play my natural game and today was no exception. Pressure doesn't get to me. Ever!! My natural pleading style is pressing people's feet and today was no exception. I went and sat at Sachin Paaji's feet and started pressing them."
"The what happened Puttar?" JatMa asked with baited breath
"As soon as Sachin Paaji opened his eyes, he saw me first. So I was given the first option of choosing either he desisting to play against us or the rest of his team not playing against us."
"So what did you choose?"
"Obviously I asked him not to play against us. But he said that he would have to take permission from his owners."
"And what did Anil puttar get?"
"Well, Sachin Paaji said to him that RCB couldn't be helped even by HIM if Kallis batted for 15 overs."
"Puttar, the water must be boiling hot by now. You have a long day tomorrow. Go get some rest and don't start your hourly night phone call to Gouti now."
This piece is a mix of a figment of one's imagination and some ideas inspired from the Mahabharata. This is an MI fan's ungli cricket piece. Let the battle begin :-)
Now who's in your T20 world cup team
Dilli-Mumbai hai-hai
The Dilli-Mumbai trash-talking session yesterday was pretty good fun, I have to say. I hope it never gets to Yankees-RedSox levels because that's just downright idiotic. But there are enough differences between the two cricketing cultures that some trash-talk is necessary and desirable. Unity in Diversity as our Founding Pitajis used to say. Without that diversity, we'd be some boringly homogeneous unit like, say, New Zealand. (No offence intended to Kiwis; I love you all very much; its just that I can't get excited about North Island-South Island rivalries).
So, in the interests of full disclosure, why don't Dilliwallahs and Mumbaiwallahs tell us all what is so distinctive and wonderful about their respective cricketing cultures? Lets get right down to the level of the respective language. Not just the gaalis but the distinctive cricketing terms. Here is one linguistic offering from me.
In Delhi University, back in the 1980s, a common term for a bowler for reducing a batsman to a quivering mess was Uski to lassi nikaldi. I loved this one; it conjured up visions of a brutal fast bowler shoving a batsman into those large brass pots I used to see in the Lajpat Nagar market and then energetically whirling the wooden handle that stuck out, till the froth formed over the drink. Poor batsman, turned into a swirling, watery yogurtish mess.
Tons more; and in a city like Mumbai, where four languages are the minimum for any self-respecting Mumbaikar, there should be tons to share. Speak up.
Jatmen rule the boxing ring even as Jatman flops at Kotla
Five Jatmen - Vijender Singh, Dinesh Kumar, Jai Bhagwan, Amandeep Singh and Paramjeet Samota asserted their supremacy at the Commonwealth Boxing Championships by winning golds for India in their respective categories. Even Manipur's Suranjoy Singh joined the party as he knocked out his opponent in about a minute and a half. He was the sixth gold medallist for India. India topped the table with 6 golds and yours truly was priviliged to witness all this live at the Talkatora stadium yesterday.
However, was ironical that original Jatman - Sehwag failed to make an impact at the Kotla later in the day.
Round 1 to the good guys!
2-3. And an opportunity, at home, to square the ledger.
In the meanwhile, a 99 run victory for the Mumbai Indians. As emphatic a statement as can be expected from the most improved squad in the IPL.
Next up, Bangalore. And another opportunity to let Robin Uthappa know that his squad lost the Ranji Trophy to us. And why he is not good enough to wear Indian ( both Mumbai and Team India) colors.
"How many times they have won is only for the record books. I don't think it counts for this game." Karnataka captain Robin Uthappa plays down Mumbai's formidable Ranji record
"But I believed we handled it better and we didn't go making statements. We understood there would be a certain amount of banter but, in all honesty, I never expected a Mumbai side, which has claims of such a great attitude, to go out and report a few issues that seemed very silly."
We remember. Oh yes, we do. And Robin, we sure as heck wont make you forget.
The baby of all battles.
“I want to watch Sachin bat”, Rajat Delhi informs me. Rajat Delhi is on his way to the Kotla. Earlier NC Delhi informed a bored member he’d like to see Sachin smash Nannes. Before that Homer Mumbai started the match debate with DD’s 3-1 IPL score line over MI. Mahek Delhi’s reply – “it will be good to see MI play well”. And to top it all, NC Delhi will watch the game with Kabir Mumbai.
Is there anything to the MI DD game, other than a class in civil engineering, should we sit together, cross legged, sip our tea and dunk our glucose biscuits? Going by the bhaichara, the game should’ve been played in the afternoon.
No Ishq Mohabbat Pyaar in Dilli for the "Indians"
It's about time someone changed their name. I hate reading headlines about them Indians snatching defeat every time they look like winning. As if reading that about your national team for decades wasn't enough!
Coming to the cricket, it's hard to predict which Mumbai side will turn up. It would be good to see them play well, even if it means the Daredevils would have to sweat for a victory. The West Indians only come in tonight so they may not play. Delhi are missing Nehra too and Sangwan doesn't have the pace or accuracy to trouble the top-heavy Mumbai lineup. I hope they don't play Warner ahead of Maharoof or Parnell, the batting is decent enough as it is and I wouldn't like to see an unbalanced side. Ladda had an okay game without looking menacing, I wouldn't mind Bhatia coming in for him.
The Mumbai story
5. 7. 1-3.
Three sets of numbers that define the Mumbai IPL story so far. 5th in the first edition. 7th in the second. And a head to head of 1-3 against that most hated of rivals, Delhi.
So far, so bleak. But like with every dark cloud or every tunnel, there is a silver lining. Or light at the end.
And what better place to begin the march to redemption than in the home of the enemy.
The tools are there. The Mumbai roster looks more balanced than it was in the previous two years. There is depth, and there is strength in depth. Mumbai has recruited well, it is now time for the recruits to repay the faith.
So Ferozshah Kotla, here we come. Ab Dilli door nahin!
Master Debate: Delhi Indians vs. Mumbai Daredevils
Some kinda Delhi team will play some sorta Mumbai team today. And a Delhiite who isn’t in Delhi will take on a Mumbaikar who is not in India – till a few weeks back, both weren’t in India.
But you can take a Delhiite/Mumbaikar out of Mumabi/Delhi but you can’t…whatever. Mumbai Indians vs. Delhi Daredevils and Homer vs. Mahek. It could get personal, but then they know each other rather well.
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