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Both Hussey and Katich are playing in their 55th test. They’re both left-handed batsmen. They’re both very quiet too. I’ve seen a few Hussey interviews, volume on, but as Floyd says, “your lips move, but I can’t hear what you’re saying”. Katich, I’m convinced, doesn’t give interviews. I have never heard his lips move. If they do, they move sideways.
It’s wonderful that Cricket Australia has stuck with such strong silent types, they add backbone to the side. Through the many crisis that Ponting has captained them, these two have been an inspiration. Post match, game lost, to either India or England, abuse and socks being hurled, and these two, arms folded, looking blankly into the mid-distance.
And that’s when Ponting stops pulling at his freshly planted hair and says, “Look at Huss…will you take a look at him”. Which is when, pokerfaced Katich, sitting alongside Hussey, slides his head ever so slightly, in Hussey’s direction and looks at him.
And Ponting continues, “and will you take a look at Kat..”. And Hussey nods, without looking at Kat.
And then Clarke jumps up, nodding, smiling, wagging his finger, standing alongside his captain. And Haddin, as always, jumps in front. And Watson barges in with his misplaced bonhomie. And Johnson sings on in the corner, “When i was little bitty baby my Mama would lock me in the closet…
And that’s why Australia need Huss and Kat. Though of course they would prefer to be referred to as Mr. Simon Mathew Katich and Mr. Michael Edward Killeen Hussey. Australian for bear.
(Oh look, Hussey + Katich chat each other up here)
Thanks to Wes of Play for country not for self for the video.
Who needs Hussey and Katich
Selfish Partners.
Yeeru and Hauti were building a huge partnership. Then it happened. A misunderstanding whereby both of them were competing for the same crease. Neither wanted to go and it took the third umpire to decide Hauti had to go. Hauti went cursing and eventually, though they made up, the selfishness of Indian Cricketers was exposed.
Eminencies reacted thus:
Steve Pough: Anyone wearing the baggy green implicitly puts the team first. If this had happened to Australia, both batsmen would have been competing to sacrifice their wicket rather than bickering to stay
Pricky Ranting: It is not about scoring centuries. You must play for the team. I would have taken one on the chin for the team and not stayed bickering there, exposing the lack of unity in team. Of course, you can't expect that from Sub-continentals.
(exit stage, murmuring, "Sach scored another century, with even that pesky DK being smart enough not to hit the winning runs. Wish I played for India - I could actually have centuries instead of mouthing platitudes on team spirit)
Ian Slipper: This is what happens when you place personal records above the team. It was bound to happen in India, of course. This will never happen in Australia
Greg Slipper: I told you, Indian culture sucks!
Michael Chalker: Aw! Look mate, we Ozzies will never be so selfish to fight publicly for staying on.
And so on...
All characters and incidents in the story are imaginary. Any resemblance to real life is purely coincidental!
by Raj
So what did your mates give you on your birthday, Simon Katich?
Their wickets? With mates like Shane, Ricky, Michael and Michael, who needs enemies?
And they say we can't play short bowling
32.4
Onions to Katich, OUT, this is up in the air at fine leg - what a catch! A stunner from Broad. On the pull, he top-edged it and Broad ran 10 or 12 yards to his right before diving, taking it low. Brilliant
SM Katich c Broad b Onions 48 (93b 6x4 0x6) SR: 51.61
45.5
Broad to Johnson, OUT, another one falls for the trap! Broad bangs it in short and Johnson hooks, but he can't keep it down, it skies out to Cook at deep square leg
MG Johnson c Cook b Broad 4 (11b 1x4 0x6) SR: 36.36
47.5
Broad to Haddin, OUT, Broad strikes with another short one! Haddin hooks but doesn't get enough of it and it bobs up to midwicket where Cook takes the catch
BJ Haddin c Cook b Broad 28 (38b 3x4 0x6) SR: 73.68
And there was North, who looked to pull, but it wasn't short enough.
Earlier on the shorter stuff, Strauss...
Steve Waugh Speaks
Dravid drops Katich @ 95. Strain your ears, and listen up to Steve Waugh say, "you just dropped the Border Gavaskar Trophy, son"
From a Koala to a Kotla Bear
by Naked Cricket
You can change its name
You can’t change its game
From a Koala to a Kotla Bear
You can change its name
You can’t change its game
Lazy, Lazy, Lazy
Hazy, Hazy, Hazy
On the day after Diwali
Over the hill, in my valley
Look, Katich the Koala
Very temperamental
Very nearly mental
Stay away, or be very gentle
Look, Clarke at the Kotla
So very grown up
With no Roy to show up
Stay away, coz he’s no pup
You can change its name
You can’t change its game
From a Koala to a Kotla Bear
You can change its name
You can't change its game
Like wombats and sloths, the Koala has a very low metabolic rate for a mammal and rests motionless for about 16 to 18 hours a day, sleeping most of that time. Koalas that are disturbed are known to be violent, their teeth and claws capable of causing considerable injury to humans; special handling requirements are as such applicable.[17]
Katich & Kaif
by Naked Cricket
A law firm yes, a cricket firm, no way.
Research reveals cricinfo’s profile picture of Katich is very unKatichlike. Simon is smiling. It resembles a grimace, but it’s more of a smile. Almost scary, but then we know how benign Simon really is. Wonder why he dropped this smile? Just can’t katich.
Then there’s Kaif. He’s got his voter’s id card photo out. There should be a stamp, but adobe photoshoped it away. Wonder why they didn’t show him squatting at silly point?
But enough of the niceties, boys, both Katich and Kaif, though humble servants of the noble game, have not been long term prospects.
They lack glamour. They’re too sincere. Their ODI strike rates are low – Katich’s is less than 70, Kaif’s less than 73 – it’s 72 odd. Very odd. That’s almost like Saurav’s or Rahul’s. But 10 less on their middle aged average. Next -
Over to Marsh & whoever it was that took over from Kaif. Yuvraj?
Next – Raina, Rohit, Raina?
Rohit & Raina. A law firm yes, a cricket firm, yes too.
And how about Marsh & Hussey, David that is.
Even their profile pictures are more cricketlike. At least David’s is.
