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Vadodara: Australia won by 4 runs
Ponting: 74
Dhoni : 34
Nagpur: India won by 99 runs
Ponting: 12
Dhoni : 124
Delhi: India won by 6 wickets
Ponting: 59
Dhoni : 71
Mohali: Australia won by 24 runs
Ponting: 52
Dhoni : 26
Hyderabad: Australia won by 3 runs
Ponting: 45
Dhoni : 6
Guwahati: Australia won by 6 wickets
Ponting: 25
Dhoni : 24
A battering rod handy, I'm looking for the moron who propagated a captain is as good as his team when it's actually the other way round.
Showing posts with label India Australia ODI 2009. Show all posts
Showing posts with label India Australia ODI 2009. Show all posts
It's the other way round
Drunk Mad Fast Bowler's Series Review.
Why before the last match?
Coz, we don't wait for no f**** dead rubber to say what we want.
Obviously i've had a beer or five, well, may be more, to drown away all the f***** visions of the f***** embarrassment. But every time I emptied a glass, visions of Twatson whacking Nehra and co kept flooding back. But this isn't about how drunk I am, but how crap India were. Of course we don't give no credit to the aussies, like every cricket loving Indian worth his salt. Even if they played with a weakened team and pulled a wedgie on us,
The Batting:
Jatman: Putting the phrase Six and out in effect throughout the tournament. But I'm against anything that even remotely connected to Brett Lee's band. Couple of Swashbuckling cameos. Then, when the opposition were looking lost, Jatman loses his wicket. Having an attacking natural game is one thing, but being reckless was what cost you your place in the ODI team a few seasons ago. The world already has one Afridi. If you wanna be the same, learn some useful legspin. the wonky off spin isn't even considered worthy of use by MS.
Sachin: Apart from the Hyderabad Hammering, not much of value. As any self respecting Indian worth his salt, we expected much more. Siddle pretty much had his number during the opening matches But again as any self respecting Indian worth his salt we refuse to see or acknowledge that. But still Thank you Sachin
Gautam Gambhir: Started of looking in orgasm inducing touch, making us question breaking up the Delhi Dostana. But one pull by Ponting into the neck triggered some sorta reaction that made him look completely out of touch. Heck no one even noticed if he was playing.
Yuvraj Singh: Again, one inning of note. Looks to be gorging out on the pies he chucks. Not that I mind, but might be hampering his running between the wickets.
MSD: We think he's first class as a batsman. Not one to please the purists but effective for sure. Won us at least two games. was unlucky on a couple of occasions. The decision to bat first on a fresh wicket in the crunch game might be criticized, but it was up to the batsmen to play out the first few overs. We spare him for now
Virat Kohli: Stop trying to look f***** cool in front of the cam, f******. This isn't a reality show. We're trying to win a f***** match. And for a lad your age, your fielding isn't something to be proud of.
Suresh Raina: Didn't Kirsten Dossier teach you anything. Why go for the customary missionary position like midwicket slog every f***** time. There's a world of unchartered space out there, give the bloody off side a chance. Just because God and Dada are there doesn't mean you'll offend them by hitting a ball there.
Ravindra Jadeja: Not too good under pressure are you kid. For f**** sake man, this is the last time we're telling you, ONLY YOU RUNNING TO THE OTHER END AND BACK WILL NOT EARN US A RUN. THERE'S GOTTA BE TWO PEOPLE TO BE ABLE TO DO IT.
Next time, we show some love to the allrounders, mainly Harbhajan Singh and Praveen Kumar and the so called bowlers. and also outstanding fielder of the month, Ashish Nehra.
Why next time?
Coz we're too drunk to type any further that's why.
Notice how I keep referring to myself in plural. F***, i've gotta be over the driving limit. Who's driving my bike home?
On decision making
And therein lies an object lesson for Team India following the series defeat to Australia. Well as Australia played, and kudos to them for winning the series with a match to spare, one cannot shake off the feeling that India beat itself rather than Australia beating it.
And the question is. why?
India has come a long way from where it was in the 80s and 90s.. Barring a purple patch between 1983 and 1985, India, for the most part, was a one man band.
Not anymore.
Personnel wise, India has an embarrassment of riches. Both batting and bowling, we have depth and variety unheard of a decade ago.
Captaincy wise too, we have come a long way. Whether by accident or design, we seem to have found the right leaders at the right time.
And yet, we are at best second best.And again,the question is, why?
For mine, the crux of the problem is decision making. Both on and off the field.
And it manifested itself in the repeated brain fades with the bat and the ball. Of Sehwag trying to dominate when in control or Praveen Kumar failing to dive on the second run. Of Bhajji bowling darts and of the Indian fielding going to pieces at the very moment it should be picking the pace.
And in the curious decisions of bowling first on a good pitch at Mohali because of the dew factor later in the day. Or batting first on a damp wicket at Gauwhati with a 8:30 AM start.
( As an aside, did no one tell the team think tank that Daljit Singh had permission from the match referee to run the rope at every interval and after the fall of every wicket? And did no one remember Lahore 2005?).
Being beaten by the opposition is understandable. But beating yourself by not backing your strengths and letting the opposition's perceived weaknesses dominate your thought process, is unpardonable.
I have a lot of time for MS Dhoni's captaincy. But is he is going to beat himself, and the team, before a ball is bowled, then it calls for a rethink.
If the Kirsten- Dhoni duo cannot help India take the next step forward, if this is the limit to what they can achieve, then India has to make a decision on its ambitions and whether this pair are the ones to bring that ambition to fruition.
And if it means another World Cup campaign done the tube, so be it. Because the larger picture, of being the best team in the world and staying that way, beckons.
This series is uncannily similar to the West Indies tour of 2006.In terms of proximity to the World Cup, expectations and result. Then, we went into a nose dive. What does the future hold for India this time?
Have we learnt from history or is it a case of "If history repeats itself, and the unexpected always happens, how incapable must Man be of learning from experience"
india lodges complaint in the icc tribunal...
following the series defeat... india lodged a complaint in the icc tribunal against australia for cheating by luring them into a 'compromising' position by promising injuries...
the verdict however was short and swift...
"the complaint reflects a flimsy story cooked up by complainant... it is prima facie evident the complainant who was not no. 1 as per icc ranking system wants to force herself as the one...
promise or lure of injuries by australia may or may not culminate into winning series. it was the responsibility of india in this series or even otherwise to protect her honour, dignity and modesty... india should not throw herself to these false promises or lures... it is for her to maintain her purity, chastity and virtues and behave to the best of her abilities without falling pray to such laxities... case dismissed..."
- inspired by
If someone else had made 175
Jatman: Reaches 175 in 27.2 overs, after which India collapses in 5.4 overs and loses by 107 runs. His 175 is criticized after Jatman holds out in an attempt to smash part timer Voges into the Bay of Bengal.
Gambhir: Reaches 175 after long chats, pats, fondles from Jatman. Also, the game is played one year ago when GG was in the form of his life.
Yuvraj: After much abuse from all the Aussies including the 12th man, Yuvi hits the next 4.5 overs for 6s. The 175th run happens by accident – in an attempt to hit his 30th consecutive six, Yuvi is dropped on the boundary. He celebrates abusing everyone including the 12th man, and the 40,000 spectators.
Raina: Dropped no less than half a dozen times doesn’t deter Raina from smashing every ball to midwicket. By the time he reaches 175, no less than 10 fielders (including the keeper) patrol the midwicket boundary.
MSD: Comes in at No. 3 after a bustling start. During the innings his hair grows, mojo returns, and the team resembles his T20 youth brigade. His 175 runs break a record number of bats, ad hoardings, and is declared ‘an ugly yet compelling innings’ by pundits.
Jadeja: Survives the most run-out attempts and third umpire referrals by any batsman in the annals of one-day cricket. The bulk of his 175 runs are made in a partnership with soulmate, Praveen Kumar.
Bhajji: After a rotten day with the ball, Bhaj stakes his claim as a batsman, keeping the allrounder tag intact. Makes a spirited 175 after the bowlers bowl a record number of full tosses wide outside off. Also appears that Watson bowled 100% of his bowling quota to Bhaj.
Praveen Kumar: Comes in when India have nothing to lose except three wickets. Partners Bhajji, Jadeja to a memorable innings during which his eyes grow bigger and bigger.
That’s 8 batsmen who scored 175. Take Sachin and you have 9. Next time, when the Indians take a five for. For what, you ask – for kicks, what else.
Game over
A few days back you had to see Jadeja, Praveen and Ashish Nehra not being able to score 3 runs.
Now here they are scoring over 100!
The noose is around the Indian team's neck. Praveen and Jadeja have decorated it to make it look a bit better.
Fancy that... Couldn't score 3 but can score a 100. Good effort boys. That's what you call a real slap and a giggle.
Australia have sent their entire cavalry to India. One more man down and you will have their school children playing and kicking our butts. The medical tourism department of India failed to cache in on the opportunities. They would have made a killing over these freaks instead they are happy harassing poor Sanjay Bangar.
Doug Bollinger takes a fiver. Very well deserved sir. He watched as Siddle jumped the line over him. I always felt he was the smarter bowler of the two and both are going about quite nicely. His number came and he said “five”.
As for India's defence of 170, I have a premonition.
Dhoni bowls and takes 7. He snarls like a beast and takes apart Marsh with a chopstick. Nehra takes the catch of the century... Upside down and between his legs with only six degrees of separation between.
Is the match over yet? Or should I still be dreaming.
Game and series over. Fancy playing 3 fast bowlers in the sub-continent. Dill-logical my sorry arse.
Aftershock
So Sachin goes on and scores one of those melodramatic hundreds, it even has an unhappy ending – the boy doesn’t get the girl, worse, the boy doesn’t get the game.
This is the stuff that rips through cricketers’ hearts. They become all soppy and soul searching. What have I become, they sing Johnny Cash, forget about the money, and missile into the game.
The day after Sachin’s 175 the former KKR captain, NZL opener, and one trick pony, Brendon McCullum scored his second hundred. If Bhajji had opened, he would have had two hundreds by now.
That’s what Sachin’s hundred did, it made a wasted Knight Rider rediscover the bat and his self esteem.
But that’s the least of it. In the land of the afternoon sunset, Guwahati, Jatman prepares for sustained assault.
He will thank Sachin tomorrow after he scores a hundred. And if he doesn’t then that’s just plain bad manners.
But let it be known, Sachin has once again touched Sehwag’s soul. Boost is the secret of my energy blurts Viru. Our energy blurts Sachin.
On another train of thought: The effects of a ton by Tendulkar
Who knew Marsh would score a hundred
The trouble with Sachin’s 175, it belittled Marsh’s first one day hundred.
We saw that coming, not Sachin's, but Marsh's hundred.
Early Bored call:
The quiet reassurance that classy openers have, Marsh has that. I see him scoring a ton this series, either Delhi or Mohali. If it happens at some another venue, I’ll take that.
But they didn’t play him in Delhi. Of course they did in Mohali and then Hyderabad.
In a way, Mohali was Marsh’s first chance, and Hyderabad his second. After his hundred, we all know he only gets going after two chances.
What happens after this is none of our business.
Gold @17k
When India need to chase in excess of 300, I need to breathe some, take a walk, get a drive, mix with the market. I did that today, got in when Sachin was a few shy of 17,000.
First the butcher, no TV, no interest there. Then Arora library, Mickey, Vickey and their Papa are huddled up in front of the TV. Vickey is the local DDCA secretary and a diehard Sachin supporter – Indian cricket starts and ends with Sachin for him. Kid bro Mickey is shrieking Sachin’s name. Sachin’s still shy of 17k.
Their Papa is repeating what at the time seemed like an original one to me, Gold toh 17,000 ho gaya hai!
One shop away I’m at Jolly drycleaners, there’s a huddle there too – My friend’s lost in clothes, but the other guys are lost in Sachin.
Next to the shop next to KP video – Mittal electronics; a bigger huddle in front of an even smaller TV. Sachin plays a few dots. The guys are ready for a toast, pepsi in plastic glasses, but they call it Thumbs up.
Sachin was there when Thumbs up still made it to Delhi. Now it’s just Sachin.
I know I have to head back to Arora with the believers, the diehard, the eternal sunshine of the spotless Sachin supporters’ minds – there with Vickey and Mickey, I cross 17k with Sachin. They believe in him more than me. A few hours later I know why. And I need another drink now.
Jatman and the spinnerman.
When did Jatman last face a spinner? This series he hasn’t, and facing Bhajji in the nets doesn’t count.
What about Amit Mishra – to downsize the little boy further, he doesn’t get a net now. While Jadeja on song doesn’t bowl all ten in the middle, in the nets they want him to bat instead.
But that has little to do with Jatman. Hauritz has still not faced him. Deal is Jatman has curfew – Sehwag ki maa told him to return from the crease within the first power play.
But just imagine, if and when Jatman faces Hauritz, even if it’s just for one ball.
Even if Jatman is at the non-strikers end: Hauritz will still be facing him.
Pause, think about Hauritz droopy sad eyebrows.
Even before he can bowl, his grip on the ball will slip, the seam will go awry, sad eyebrows even sadder – don’t do me like that.
Ponting will give Hauritz two mid-offs – the taller guy a few feet behind.
Of course Jatman will hit Hauritz there, nowhere else to go.
But the result don’t matter, what does is that Jatman and spinnerman will meet.
Today. There’s nothing else to this series, is there?
And say, if they get beyond their shy acquaintance – if it lasts six balls, a full over, a moment in time.
How will Jatman flog the spinnerman, like he would a sinnerman.
The tight angles behind will come into play, inside out, outside in, no way out, cut a mutt, get outta the rut, the dead series could come alive.
If only Ponting removes mid off.
dissecting india's loss...
the batsman at the crease is looking good for more and threatens to take you apart... as a seasoned bowler you take the long on off and give the next ball more flight... batsman thinks it is another off spinner, plays the ball exactly there but since it turns out to be a doosra he ends up beaten in flight and the ball goes straight to long off for a simple catch...
then you start thinking you have done the job and take pleasure in the fact that you have curtailed what could have been a fatal innings... but to your horror you see the long off fielder celebrating the catch even before he has taken it and before you know he drops a sitter...
i wonder whether india will be feeling like this bowler after yesterday's loss...
Chalking up Frequent Flyer Points
I wonder if WAGs really mind their men being on the road for so long. With the kind of travel schedule cricketers have, they must be chalk up more frequent flier points to get free tickets to Hawaii every year. Tendulkar probably has more points this year than the number of runs he's scored in his career. Why complain about being on the road when you're flying most of the time?
This dose of bad humour was needed to highlight the ridiculousness of the order of match allocation on the part of BCCI. I did a bit of research on the distance between the cities hosting the 7 ODIs. As per the current schedule, this is the distance (As the crow flies) between venues hosting consecutive matches:
Vadodara-Nagpur: 624 km
Nagpur-Delhi: 854 km
Delhi-Chandigarh: 238
Chandigarh-Hyderabad: 1496 km
Hyderabad-Guwahati: 1683 km
Guwahati-Mumbai: 2096 km
That's a grand total of 6,991 kilometres.
However, if the BCCI wanted to minimise travel time, they could have gone in with something like:
Hyderabad-Nagpur: 425
Nagpur-Guwahati: 1406
Guwahati-Delhi: 1460
Delhi-Chandigarh: 238
Chandigarh-Vadodara: 1004
Vadodara-Mumbai: 368
for a total of 4,901 kilometres, almost 2100 kilometres less than what they're traveling now. To put this into perspective, Delhi to Bangalore is 2,065 kilometres by road and google says it takes 1 day and 9 hours to cover that distance. It shouldn't be too hard for someone who is minting millions to come up with an efficient itinerary. If it is, just hire me and I'll take care of everything.
Why Tendulkar shouldn't open with Sehwag
Experts have talked at length about how Sehwag and Gambhir bat well with each other. Their numbers certainly point to the same and make a great case for them to be opening the innings. Obviously it wasn't going to happen tonight as Gambhir was ruled unfit. But we saw India get off to a great start with Sehwag blazing away at one end. But even when he was batting with a strike rate of over 200 - a good five times better than his partner's strike rate - he faced less than half the deliveries in the innings. One has to wonder how often this would happen if the Delhi duo were batting together. Tendulkar is still at the crease and there's every chance he will go on to score some good runs (Well he just got out and it's game on now), but I can't help but feel he needs to ensure Sehwag doesn't get cold standing at the non-striker's end.
I've come up with a measure to quantify the effectiveness with which batsmen share the strike in a partnership. It's as uncomplicated as Sehwag's batting and anyone with a passing knowledge of cricket can understand it. Based on that measure, the Sehwag-Tendulkar partnership tonight operated at an efficiency of 19.89%, meaning Sehwag got less than a fifth of the strike he should have got in that partnership. The numbers for their partnership in the first three ODIs: 24.8%, 75.5%, 60%.
the after effects of robbing singh...
is it only me or have you also noticed that since robbing singh was sacked from the job... team india has started fielding well...
fielders are attacking the ball... curbing the singles in inner circle... hitting stumps too with regularity as jadeja showed with the dismissal of ponting...
i would attribute all this to the 'after effects' of robbing singh...
DKNY: Back in fashion again
It is now a proven fact: Indian cricketers, especially the openers are falling over each other, and putting themselves in harm’s way, to give Dinesh Karthik aka DKNY that lucky break.
While injury to Jatman will naturally affect his man, Gambhir, and vice versa, any injury to Sachin Tendulkar is unrelated to the Delhi openers.
In fact, India can now boast of three openers whose injury woes are almost Australian. At the Kotla, Jatman and his man were seen close to the Fosters drinks’ cart which has since then been carted away for questioning. It is still unknown whether the cart or the Fosters' girls were hitting on them.
Both players claimed that they were not hit by the girls.
At the thana, repeated replies of “ Austrylian for beer” were met with the customary lathi charge. The Fosters’ girls fled to Mohali, keeping another cart company.
Far from all this, DKNY spoke with a briskness of the New Yorker that he is: “happytobeback happytobeback!”
That's ok, but are we happy to have you back?
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