 |
| click on cartoon |
First it was Alice, who was in IPL-land. The evening show was cancelled. Little did the movie listings in HT City and Delhi Times know. Little did I know. PVR knew of course.
So what do I do next time – I check the PVR website – It confirms LSD @10.45 pm, Tuesday, 30th March, 2010. Turns out the PVR site is way off too. They don’t care to update. At the ticket counter they inform me there is no phone number to check timings. The website has it all. Yeah, I was checking the timings on BCC! and you guys are on LSD.
Unrelated, but I hear there aren’t many takers for the IPL at PVR – who in their right mind wants to watch the IPL with pricey popcorn and cola in a dark room with four signs showing you the door – EXIT.
I also hear pubs are sucking up with booze+khanna starting @600 bucks. I’m curious, where do you watch the IPL, boss – how much will you shell out? Show me the money.
We're almost halfway through the IPL and today was a slow day for most teams. I'm starting to realise why I'm so terrible at Twenty20. I was mulling over changes to my team yesterday and wondering whether I should go for Warner and Ojha or Sehwag and Murali. I don't need to tell you what I did, my place in the table is evidence enough.
Mumbai play their 6th home game out of 7 tomorrow and this would be a good time to bank on Sachin. You probably don't need me to tell you but it's not like I have any useful tips to offer anyway. So make sure he's in your side and don't forget to leave a thank you message after he's won a man of the match. Not for me, for Sachin.
Hit me, hit me, till I lose control….no, hit me while I lose control. It baffles me why Ishant played for KKR today, wasn’t he just dropped for the last game? But that’s how it is for Ishant with the nationals, he’s dropped one game, then we’re reminded of his promise, and he’s back. Then he breaks the promise, and he’s off. Then he’s back.
The promise never goes away, the form is almost within grasp. Stuff like this makes you think horrible bad things about cricket, like some sponsors sponsor Ishant into every second game – he even looks like one of those 300 ml bottles. Now I would’ve drawn that out but I’m on to one of those 330 ml bottles.
Haha! But wasn’t it cute how he was all padded up and walking out with bat and good intentions on the fall of the 9th wicket today. Too bad that was the last ball of the 20th over.
Then again, this was the Kotla. He must’ve wanted to join the huddle in middle. But yaar, Dilli door thi, Ishant ke liye.
(thought about while Akshay Kumar was jumping around like a monkey and laughing like a donkey)
1) Win or lose, someone makes money – IPL 1 was the beginning. There were the DLF Maximums and the Citi Moments of Success. We stifled a puke. IPL 2 introduced the strategic timeout. We almost barfed. Now in addition to the DLFers, we have the Karbonn Kamaal Catches. And ads between deliveries. Shots of the MRF blimp thingy. Lots of shots of the MRF blimp thingy. Akshay Kumar heehawing, Gauti – Viru doing a Brokeback imitation, players singing “Ooh La La La La”…cannot control it, gotta go hurl.
2) Owners or mascots – More than the players, the franchises are increasingly being recognized by their team owners/mascots, especially the female ones. Preity Zinta is KXIP, Nita Ambani is MI and Shilpa Shetty is RR. A great shot by Tendulker and the next shot is of Nita Ambani with her half an inch smile. A diving stop by Yuvraj (becoming a rarity these days) and we see Zinta jumping up and down. What better way to target the female demography which controls the remote control in the Indian homes than to show someone whom they can identify with the most?
3) Harsha Bhogle is God – Amidst all the nonsensical soundbytes about tracer bullets, huge shots (which barely cross the ropes) and double Ds, there is one beacon of hope, an oasis in the desert, a diamond of the coal mine, a….should stop (hearing too much commentary is injurious for mental health),. He goes by the name of Harsha Bhogle. The man is awesome enough to talk sense even while burdened with compulsorily plugging those sponsors. The man was the first to mention ICL and get away with it. He also spoke words to the effect of “The law is an ass”. And he also is self assured enough to tolerate jokes about his brand new hair.
4) Welcome to E..E…Extraa Innings – You want any proof of Set Max trying to capture the eyeballs of the ladies. I present you the hosts (in the set and on the field). All chosen based on the symmetry of their faces, broad shoulders and proven track record of attracting the ladies. Only thing forgotten by the worthies working for the channels was checking the effect brought about by the “hunks” exercising their vocal chords. For proof of that, I submit before you the only exhibit required – Angad Bedi!! The only thing he is good at is wearing a too small for his biceps suit. His stammering makes SRK’s talking seem normal. He looks petrified before the camera and he makes you do something totally against his brief- change the channel. However one good side effect of hiring this flesh and blood mannequin is that the ranting of a certain retired left arm slow bowler have ceased. For the time being.
5) The ICL effect – Who among the new Indian players seem promising to you? Most of you will pick Sathish, Rayadu, and Jhunjhunwala among others like Tiwari and Tiwary, Naman Ojha and half the RR side (Warne is awesome btw.). The common thread that binds the first three chaps is that they were earlier known as the ICL rebels. These are not the only one. Waiting in the wings are other ICLers like Stuart Binny, G. Vighnesh and Ali Murthaza. One chance and I bet they would prove themselves invaluable. Two years in that league have certainly enhanced the skills of these guys. For that, ICL should be given its due.
6) Class: IPL 1 was not good for the senior citizenry of cricket with Tendulkar, Kallis and Gilly struggling to keep up with the relatively new format. IPL 2 saw them more attuned. IPL 3 is seeing them at their best showing the young turks why they are the real deal. Tendulkar’s “killing ‘em softly” strokeplay, Kallis’s all round excellence and Murali’s vicious turners (not to forget Vaas, Hayden and Kumble) are the real highlight of the IPL for me.
These are some of the random thoughts about the IPL crossing my mind today. And I have not even mentioned other awesome fellas like Agarkar. More to come.
by Dhaanu
blogs at Bakwaas Baatein (Random rambling of a raving borderline lunatic)
It was a good day for me with Naman Ojha and Sachin Tendulkar getting me enough points to jump 7 places in the league. Beat that, Warnie! Even Jatman moved up a couple of places thanks to Harbhajan's one-off allround display. Ach is slipping a bit while ABVan and Aditya are opening up a gap at the top.
Tomorrow sees the Daredevils in action after a while so you guys might want to bring in some of the good guys. Watch out for the playing XI after the toss as Gambhir and/or Nehra might be back.
There was a time I used to finish games. Now I just finish them. Never before have I spoken in italics, but that’s my embarrassing IPL form. The umpires make it worse – if I’m lucky, they give me out the first time. But the arthritis, what can I say – my legs are all over in a heap, they feel like wood – and mostly I mistake my left leg for my bat, I place front foot forward instead of bat. I wish I was batting with two bats and one right leg.
Now that I have been dropped, it can’t get worse – they can’t send me back to India. But I’m open to being sent back to South Africa. Hear me talk, I sound like a leech. Sucking free money of my heart broken franchise owners – Zinta had high hopes on me, but what can you say, she had high hopes on Yuvi.
After all this, my bank manager is quite happy – he says, I should target the trading period and work on my net form and ask opposition coaches to review me there. That is not easy. I have made some videos and am circulating them – one of them landed in the wrong hands, Moody’s – he kept asking me, whose batting body I had morphed my head into. One of the crude Punjabi players joked that our games should be played in the nets, then both Yuvi and I will fire. Now, looks like they will fire us.
Loss of form makes me repeat, makes me repeat…next time I want to play for a franchise whose home ground will be Lord’s. It will also help if we are set a target, 326 will be a good one to chase. I’m saying this because coaches have always told me, think positive, think about the good times.
Honestly, should there even be an update tonight? Boring game between two terrible sides. It might have been a close one when you consider how bad they are but Punjab contrived to make Ganguly look like Dada. Heck even Agarkar looked like he fancied bowling in the big league.
So what does this mean for our league? Well nothing. The shambolic umpiring has meant my Trump Player got out for a duck and I'm still stuck at 20. Jatman is still floundering in 26th place. Sure, it's been kind for ABVan, but Ach has dropped another place.
Well, the Royals are back in contention but I wish I could say the same about my team. Nohit decided to screw my team over by running out Symonds and the Deccan bowlers thought Yusuf was vulnerable to the length ball. Oh well, I hope all you Yusuf backers are happy he's got you some points. ABVan has kept his top spot and also has 19 transfers left. Ach slips a place while Jatman has stayed put on 26th.
this is my first reaction when i saw the team...
apparently they do not like to learn from history... so they have picked yuvraj singh like they selected sehwag last time, more in hope (and on reputation) than on fitness and form... and here's our chief selector who not so long ago vowed to the whole nation to never pick an injured player again... what a way to 'keep' his promise...
all i can say about rohit sharma's selection is that i have never seen a player being selected so often on promise only... a certain manish pandey has every reason to feel unlucky to miss out... coz he has not only shown promise but delivered consistently... across various platforms...
but the surprise selection is chawla's return... obviously ojha and mishra lost the battle for the second spinner's spot not with chawla the spinner... but chawla the batsman... i can already see them hitting net not with ball but bat in hand... which is unfortunate...
here is the squad...
MS Dhoni (capt & wk), Virender Sehwag, Gautam Gambhir, Yuvraj Singh, Suresh Raina, Yusuf Pathan, Dinesh Karthik, Ravindra Jadeja, Zaheer Khan, Praveen Kumar, Ashish Nehra, Harbhajan Singh, Piyush Chawla, Vinay Kumar, Rohit Sharma
Act 1 -
All hail the prince. Icon-cricketer. Son of the soil. Captain of the franchise.
Act 2 -
Prince past prime. Prince underperforms. Team underperforms. Team sulks & sucks. Aussie coach unhappy. Owners unhappy. Aussie coach convinces owners to dump captain. Prince loses captaincy. Team wicketkeeper made captain.
Act 3 -
Prince past prime. Prince continues to underperform. Team continues to underperform. Team still sulks and sucks. Aussie coach still unhappy. Owners still unhappy. New captain's batting also sucks. Prince also sulks.
And we are not talking about Ganguly, Buchanan, SRK or McCullum! It is a uncanny almost surreal parallel. Delicious. Can wait for Act4 - episode 1025.
I watch IPL because it beats any other soap. Of course it is not for the cricket, silly!
By Anonymous
Another masterclass from Tendulkar has seen his believers soar to the top. Yours truly jumped a place too thanks to his restrained faith in the Little Master. Jatman, meanwhile, has stuck to a purely Indian XI. He tried going with just his Daredevils but it's hard to back players falling like tenpins. Atleast Agent Dhawan helped him move up the board.
Tomorrow sees the Deccan Chargers play after a long gap. Make sure you don't pick Gilchrist, Symonds, Nohit or Vaas. They're only going to help you stay/jump ahead of me and I might just bar your team from the league if you do that. This is also a good time to fill your players with the Royal Chokers, they don't play again till the 31st. This will help you get on my good side and I'm the Commish.
Alice's Adventures in Wonderland, the Dormouse ask Alice "That begins with an M, such as... muchness - you know you say things are 'much of a muchness' - did you ever see... a drawing of a muchness?"
His ‘muchness’ is fast disappearing, but that’s not such a worry. The spoilt brat of India cricket, Yuvi, aka Yuvraj, aka, Crybaby No 1, is now turning toxic. Much like his mentor, the imperious Sourav Ganguly aka Lord Snooty, Yuvraj has decided that the best way to regain his captaincy is to behave like a perfect ass, bat like a donkey, field like a khachar, and bray like a mule. His only redeeming feature at present being is pie-chucker variety of bowling. Go figure!
All this is not such a worry for Team India as other exciting is fast emerging, but is proving to be a REAL concern for Preity’s team. It is clearly sucking the life-blood out of King’s Eleven Punjab. Sack the bugger or, if you don’t want to hurt the poor mama’s boy’s feeling for fear that me might burst in tears and flood the playing area, somebody trip on his bad knee during practice. Get him out of the team or start mapping KKR’s 2009 journey.
Forget about his transgressions, like security breach, indiscipline etc. These are minor issues. The problem is attitude and this must be dealt with square on. One reverse sweep against Murali does not count for much.
The Punjabis and the country deserve much better than a sulking hulk pretending to be a cricketer.
By Daman
I've just put up a post (over at Cricinfo's Different Strokes) about my life as a cricket spectator while I was a student at Delhi University. Were other Bored members or readers also such chronic time-wasters during their college years? For the sake of Desh, I hope not. For the sake of solidarity, I hope so.
I'm going to be writing a bit more about the college cricket-watching years in the days to come. The cleaner stories will go up at Different Strokes. The more raunchy ones at Eye-on-Cricket and here. Hope that works for folks.
But the point of this post was to get Bored folks to write a bit about their personal experiences watching cricket (whether in the US or elsewhere, or back in Desh). Different parts of Desh provide different environments for watching the game. I'd be interested in hearing about them. I'm hoping others would be as well.
17 out of the 56 league games have now been completed... thats just about 30%, so there is a long way to go yet... so preserve those changes, you might need them at the rate at which players are getting injured. You've probably settled on the kind of team you like and will only make the odd change here and there for a specific match, like maybe Yusuf Pathan for Symonds every two matches... but remember if one of your low priced players goes out, like say Rayadu at $75k, you might find it hard to squeeze in another (and maintain the allowed combo ratios of batsmen, bowlers and allrounders) - so you might end up making more than one change...
Enough of strategy, here are the current standings... oh look, is that a dashing Bored Member leading the charts :D
KKR vs MI, from back to front, how it panned out -
Dada played fine leg, Tendu plays third man.
Saurav's one-handed catch:
That ball must not have been travelling
A Haharsha catch
Ishant after being bashed around:
"Ek aur nahin karoonga"
Response to Sehwag's tweet
So is KKR RT @sehwagvirender: Supporting MI.
When the MI batsmen call 2, the KKR fielders call 4
Lovely angles and ungals from Tendu - dada feeling much fingered
All the fielders look like Dada, the rolls, somersaults, extra effort where none is needed
Dravid to Sachin - "No, no, no you can't unretire from intl. T20s, you're not Pak..."
Kumble on today's game: Only one team was playing cricket
KKR strat - let's play out Bhajji, Malinga, Zaks, Mc...
Why doesn't Bhajji bowl like this for the other Indians
Ganguly attempts the chinese cut; instead some sushi
Keeeper appealing enthusiastically to make up for earlier lapses. smart.
MI strategy: choke the off side runs, bowl a wide legside line
With that haircut, Shikhar Dhawan really should play more
Remarkable, Dada clears the 30 yard circle and a boundary in front of square - on the on
Ok, let's swap the fineleg fielder with the keeper
Dravid: On the legside first there's the devil, then there's dada
For Dada four finelegs pls.
Also, gng by the Karbonn ad, Viru now needs a laugh transplant
You can follow BoredCricket on twitter here
Mendis and Murali, arguably both Sri Lankans, have both bowled super overs – they both lost it for their teams. Captain Raina disagreed, throwing that “cricket is a team sport, and we collectively lost it” logic. Murali disagreed with Raina taking complete credit for the defeat.
When contacted Mendis claimed he did not remember playing in the IPL, leave alone bowling a super over.
Jatman had an altogether different take – appears when the Daredevils hand Dilshan or Maharoof the ball, they are also told, “Do anything, but don’t bowl a super over”
No doubt like the IPL, that’s a good joke, but usually the batsman has the last laugh. Dilshan’s last over was anything but super and went for 6, 6, 6, though not in that order – it was anarchy.
As for Maharoof, like Dilshan, he too has been dropped to concentrate on not bowling a ‘super over’.
Yuvraj wins the World Cup…er a match for Punjab. This is a special gift, that only a few special players have – Yuvi is one of them, Yuvraj Singh another. Whenever they win a game for India it is special – when they win one for their IPL team, it is doubly special. A reverse sweep down square leg, fine leg, third man – where the ##@ did it go, yaar? Yeah, CSK didn’t know either. They were looking like the game was over, which it was. Hayden’s face and bat both shrunk. Raina walked down to midwicket, and asked – “why did you do this to me?”
But Yuvi and Yuvraj Singh – how they barked at the impertinence of the press and twitter. He rolled all the worlds MCs, BCs into one big MCBC (it was heartfelt like some Ossibissa song) – but you won’t get the point, will you?
Earlier Yuvi had rolled his MCs BCs into one when that Bisla-who-does-he-think…refused him a suicidal single for the greater good of Yuvi and Yuvraj Singh’s Punjab. Bisla shrunk, he almost curled into his uniform and vanished. He then played a dot ball.
Worth a think, which was better – Yuvi lashing Bisla, or Yuvraj Singh lashing the world in that super over? Where is Bhajji when you need him?
An excerpt from the latest Hockey promo in support of the Delhi Daredevils:
“Is bar Delhi Daredevils ka match Feroz Shah Kotla main ho raha hai…main Daredevils ka har match dekhne jaoonga…aap aoge naah…main intezar karoonga…phir dil doh Delhi Daredevils ko, Hero Honda dhak dhak go!”
Interesting to have a Chennai boy Dinesh Karthik lead DelhiThe Dilli-Mumbai trash-talking session yesterday was pretty good fun, I have to say. I hope it never gets to Yankees-RedSox levels because that's just downright idiotic. But there are enough differences between the two cricketing cultures that some trash-talk is necessary and desirable. Unity in Diversity as our Founding Pitajis used to say. Without that diversity, we'd be some boringly homogeneous unit like, say, New Zealand. (No offence intended to Kiwis; I love you all very much; its just that I can't get excited about North Island-South Island rivalries).
But hey, we're making money The biggest thrill in the world is entertaining the public, there is no bigger thrill than that - Vince Mcmahon
Tell that to Shahid Afridi. Afridi is a victim. Of his own intelligence primarily, but also to a lesser level, to the losing battle that sport as combat is fighting with sport as entertainment. Let me elaborate. Pretty much every organized sport in the world is doing what long haired Bangalore metalhead machas refer to in fits of righteous spite as “that Metallica thing.” Put simply, sports administrators everywhere are trying to bring the crowds in. In purists’ language, this amounts to “selling out”. The question of how much the “laws” of cricket allow tampering with the ball is ultimately a particular reformulation of the question “How much should sport be looked at as a form of entertainment?”
Cricket’s doing it as well. A lot of it. In fact they have been so good at this that even KISS might learn a lesson or two from them. The boundaries have gotten smaller, the pitches are made dead to demand, and despite the advent of adequate protection, anything thrown by a fast bowler that the batsman cant hit easily is generally re-bowled, with a free run thrown in for good measure. Let’s face it. The general audience likes to see boundaries. The same argument made in favour of Britney Spears being a brilliant musician because she sold albums by the millions can be made to justify this death blow being served to the art of bowling. On the face of it, the logic seems to be quite unimpeachable. If most people like it, it should be good for the game right?
Wrong. It could very well backfire. And it’s happened before. The 80’s were an exciting time for the NBA. Bird, Isiah and Magic were still fighting it out and the genius that would be soon acclaimed as the greatest of them all had made his appearance in Chicago. The dunk became a highpoint of the basketball game and people thronged in to see it. It wasn’t long before the league realized that making it easier for the players to dunk would increase ticket sales and television ratings. It wasn’t that the NBA was not a moneymaking enterprise. Basketball was already a game that favoured the offence heavily in the rules.
The NBA had already outlawed most tight zone defenses and converted a two half game into a four quarter game for more commercial breaks (those watching the IPL will know what I’m talking about here). Now it introduced another rule called he defensive three second violation by which one couldn’t even stand in own’s own D for more than three seconds. This effectively killed all forms of zone defense, and made NBA much more popular in the short run. But over the years, it’s killed the game. Its become very hard to play good defense in the NBA and as a result, from having a dream team that beat everyone else by at least 30 points in the Olympics in 1992, the USA went to a place where its superstar laden national teams were getting beaten by Serbia, Greece, Spain and even Puerto Rico. They simply couldn’t play against a well organized zone defense. One reason why a lot of people don’t think Kobe or Lebron could have played as well as Jordan did is because these guys haven’t achieved their superstardom playing against the bruising defense of the 80s.
Volleyball, on the other hand, presents a slightly different picture. It also decided to sell itself better and got the table tennis scoring system introduced a few years ago, replacing the service change system to make gameplay faster and more exciting. At the same time, it also brought in the concept of the Libero, which was a player who could only pick and set and not attack. When in the frontline, the Libero could be substituted freely with an attacker. The first rule is almost universally cursed. Instead of making games more exciting, it made it duller. Earlier, each point had to be won on your own serve, and I’ve witnessed rallies of up to 30 service changes without a single point being scored. Now the team which gets a slight lead in the beginning keeps on winning points off the opposing team’s serve till the set is over. The libero rule on the other hand, is widely praised.
It gave a fillip to the defense. Basically, you had a really agile guy on your backcourt who could pick balls better and this made for longer and more interesting rallies. When his turn came for forecourt duty, he could be easily replaced with an attacker, thus not taking away from the game, but also truly adding to it. On the whole, the changes didn’t do as much damage as they could have done.
Cricket that way, is slightly strange. Every other game glorifies the attack, and negates the defense. Cricket is perhaps the only game where the defense (the bastman is defending his stumps from the bowler who’s attacking them) is favoured over the offense by the crowds. But that still does not justify favouring one set of skills over the other. Bowling as an art is being systematically strangled. Look at it this particular example. Technology has advanced enough for a batsman to have all the protection he needs from the cricket ball without materially affecting his freedom of motion. And yet, the short ball is still penalized. The fielding rules in cricket are a direct parallel to the 3 second defensive violation in basketball. What’s the powerplay if not a device to achieve more of the cricket equivalent to the slamdunk in basketball (a boundary)? Smaller fields are effectively making spin bowling an obsolete tactic. When Pakistan came up with reverse swing, the cricketing equivalent to the planned urban settlements of Harappa, there always were “cheater” whispers all round. Perhaps the only bowler friendly decision taken by the ICC in recent times has been allowing Murali to bowl legally. And even that had everyone up in arms.
Where’s the balance guys? What happened to fair competition? A team game in best enjoyed when one team’s offense battles the other’s defense. If I am not horribly mistaken, the 2011 World Cup is going to be a battle between the batting sides of participating teams. It’s going to be such a pity. But hey, I just heard on Sportscenter that Sepp Blatter is thinking of abolishing the offside rule in football. Why not? Lets keep changing the rules till every sport becomes the philosophical equivalent of the WWE. Lots of people watch the WWE. So what if it’s scripted? It makes money, doesn’t it?
By Jian Johnson
Before he grasped the importance of money, Jian aspired to be a professional athlete. Currently, he thinks about sports during cigarette breaks at work. You can read Jian's Live Journal at www.3xsoncalvary.livejournal.com
Five Jatmen - Vijender Singh, Dinesh Kumar, Jai Bhagwan, Amandeep Singh and Paramjeet Samota asserted their supremacy at the Commonwealth Boxing Championships by winning golds for India in their respective categories. Even Manipur's Suranjoy Singh joined the party as he knocked out his opponent in about a minute and a half. He was the sixth gold medallist for India. India topped the table with 6 golds and yours truly was priviliged to witness all this live at the Talkatora stadium yesterday.
However, was ironical that original Jatman - Sehwag failed to make an impact at the Kotla later in the day.
2-3. And an opportunity, at home, to square the ledger.
In the meanwhile, a 99 run victory for the Mumbai Indians. As emphatic a statement as can be expected from the most improved squad in the IPL.
Next up, Bangalore. And another opportunity to let Robin Uthappa know that his squad lost the Ranji Trophy to us. And why he is not good enough to wear Indian ( both Mumbai and Team India) colors.
"How many times they have won is only for the record books. I don't think it counts for this game." Karnataka captain Robin Uthappa plays down Mumbai's formidable Ranji record
"But I believed we handled it better and we didn't go making statements. We understood there would be a certain amount of banter but, in all honesty, I never expected a Mumbai side, which has claims of such a great attitude, to go out and report a few issues that seemed very silly."
We remember. Oh yes, we do. And Robin, we sure as heck wont make you forget.
“I want to watch Sachin bat”, Rajat Delhi informs me. Rajat Delhi is on his way to the Kotla. Earlier NC Delhi informed a bored member he’d like to see Sachin smash Nannes. Before that Homer Mumbai started the match debate with DD’s 3-1 IPL score line over MI. Mahek Delhi’s reply – “it will be good to see MI play well”. And to top it all, NC Delhi will watch the game with Kabir Mumbai.
Is there anything to the MI DD game, other than a class in civil engineering, should we sit together, cross legged, sip our tea and dunk our glucose biscuits? Going by the bhaichara, the game should’ve been played in the afternoon.
It's about time someone changed their name. I hate reading headlines about them Indians snatching defeat every time they look like winning. As if reading that about your national team for decades wasn't enough!
Coming to the cricket, it's hard to predict which Mumbai side will turn up. It would be good to see them play well, even if it means the Daredevils would have to sweat for a victory. The West Indians only come in tonight so they may not play. Delhi are missing Nehra too and Sangwan doesn't have the pace or accuracy to trouble the top-heavy Mumbai lineup. I hope they don't play Warner ahead of Maharoof or Parnell, the batting is decent enough as it is and I wouldn't like to see an unbalanced side. Ladda had an okay game without looking menacing, I wouldn't mind Bhatia coming in for him.
5. 7. 1-3.
Three sets of numbers that define the Mumbai IPL story so far. 5th in the first edition. 7th in the second. And a head to head of 1-3 against that most hated of rivals, Delhi.
So far, so bleak. But like with every dark cloud or every tunnel, there is a silver lining. Or light at the end.
And what better place to begin the march to redemption than in the home of the enemy.
The tools are there. The Mumbai roster looks more balanced than it was in the previous two years. There is depth, and there is strength in depth. Mumbai has recruited well, it is now time for the recruits to repay the faith.
So Ferozshah Kotla, here we come. Ab Dilli door nahin!
Some kinda Delhi team will play some sorta Mumbai team today. And a Delhiite who isn’t in Delhi will take on a Mumbaikar who is not in India – till a few weeks back, both weren’t in India.
But you can take a Delhiite/Mumbaikar out of Mumabi/Delhi but you can’t…whatever. Mumbai Indians vs. Delhi Daredevils and Homer vs. Mahek. It could get personal, but then they know each other rather well.
Another day gone, another swap at the top. Ach didn't have a great day as he didn't have any players in the first game of the day while Nihal nailed it by having Kallis as his Trump Player. ABVan is still lurking in second place while Jatman has dropped down the table. Quick pat on the back for yours truly for finally making the top 10. Thumbs down for the Knightriders for not playing Che. Cholbe na!
I have still not made any changes in my Bored game team. But these @#$%* they dropped my trump player Che Pujara, good they lost. Playing Rohan Gavaskar instead of Che is like the Daredevils team playing my son 30 years later so I can have a smiling face in commentary and have Bhogle’s son talk about my favourite street food in Dilli.
Tomorrow we play the Mumbai Indians. I find their name really funny. It is like we should be called the Delhi Daredevils Indians. I’m looking forward to smashing their bowlers but I do not want to hurt Sachin’s feelings so I might even get out cheaply.
your man, jatman
There wasn't any. Actually there was. Naman Ojha was smashing the Delhi Indian all over the moth-covered Motera. Mishy tossed up another one and Ojha went for a big one, only to see the ball turn the other way and take his middle stump. Nothing new for Mishra, but his reaction was something. Not quite Harbhajan-like, but atleast he managed to show some anger. Keep it up, Mishy.
Manoj Tiwary = Former Daredevils bench-warmer and now a KKR match-winner.
Owais Shah = Shitty-Daredevils-bat-turned-gritty-KKR-bat.
Ishant Sharma = Still looks for Sehwag and finds only Ganguly when celebrating dismissals.
Vijay Dahiya= Dav Whatmore’s sidekick.
______________________________
KKR = Delhi/Daredevils B team.
The contest on the pitch might have been boring and one-sided but the Bored League has seen another swap at the top. Ach has been smashing our collective souls but what wouldn't we give to find Nihal's Modis Operandi? Jatman had a bad day, maybe he'll make up for it tomorrow on the field.
Yesterday saw Yusuf Pathan smash the Mumbai bowlers into oblivion. Too bad he couldn't ensure the Royals came out on top. However, he has helped Achettup's SoaL Smashers reach the top of our league. But as Shastri would say, there is a LOT of cricket to be played. One gets the feeling Achettup's stint at the top might JUST be short-lived. (Click on the image to go to the league page)
This feels like a job, rambling one moment after the other (esp. when they’re misnomer moments) – but that’s what wine fuel can do. The Daredevils v Punjab game, was there really a moment – it sucked the life out of moments, games such as this give the IPL a bad name. I couldn’t care less if DD lost this, but I was happy when they won it. And I can’t explain that to me, so I won’t try with you.
Ok, there was a moment, manufacturing it anyway – it was when…eh, well, you know…this is tough. Ok, when my favourite Daredevil Manhas, got his and DD’s nose in front – I’ve tweeted that one before, but it was worth a retweet. Love it when the invisible cricketer shines some; would have been happy had Kaif scored a 50 of 9 balls too.
Think the IPL has got beyond teams for me, more into playing favoutites with players now – like was I happy to see Mahroof get a game finally. I mean, how much of a honeymoon do they want him to have?
also on bored: Manhas the badass
It’s only two days and it feels like second life already. This IPL can be rough, eat on sleep, eat at you, eat you up. There was Yususf Pathan, his innings was a moment – he stapled it together, not with the shots, but with the calm after the storm. If you watched him go nuts last month blanking everybody, you knew what was coming.
He’s stopped chewing gum. At least you can’t tell he’s chewing it anymore. There is no nervous energy, getting him out first ball – of course that happens when he plays for India, not for Warne or in the locals.
There is a reason MS has been backing him more than RP. When Yusuf surfaced one summer in a T20 World Cup Final, opening, replacement for Sehwag, you was thinking – who’s that guy, 6 and out. But he did open. And he will be on that flight to the Windies next month.
It’s amazing what some work on the wiring can do.
the organisers in their bid to make the game high scoring games (which they think will automatically make it interesting) have brought the boundary ropes so close that it has started to look like an extension of the 30 yards circle...
taking nothing away from pathan's blistering innings who played like a man on a mission contrary to his image... it was his first six that made me cringe...feeling for the bowler's role in t20...
the first six he attempted was clearly a miscued one... ball swirled in the air and so did his bat... the ball took an upper edge and on a normal ground would have been a straight catch down mid-on's throat...here it turned out to be a comfortable six... what followed was nothing but mayhem...
what could have been a prized wicket for murtaza turned up into a very expensive over... a cruel, cruel injustice...
what else but the sight of CHE'teshwar pujara... walking down at the fall of the first wicket...
though he has been with kolkata knight riders since the beginning... it took him three years to make his debut... such is the cricketing expertise of kkr's think tank...
though he didn't last long... but the way he played some shots covering the prodigious swing vaas was getting early on was the sign of how good a batsman he is... the bat was coming straight covering not only the line but the late inswing and still he made them count for runs!
if only he had lasted longer we would have witnessed the heady cocktail of aesthetic pleasures of sound batting mixed with the unorthodoxy of t20 cricket...
i wish now that they have selected him... kkr think tank doesn't confine him to the dugout... and would give him a fair run... and as some say... his right to fail...
It's not easy to be at two places at the same time, that’s why I never turned up for the Hockey World Cup. Now I am playing in the Indian Premier League (IPL) – and I have also signed up for the Indian Bored League (IBL). I was told it’s just a game so I agreed.
I registered in the Bored Game – this cricinfo Fantasy cricket game. They have a limit of 6 players from one team, so I could not include 11 Daredevils. No problem.
I included a few players from the Delhi Ranji team like Shikhar Dhawan, Ishant and Kohli. They are all good boys and I have played with them. They listen to me.
I was about to add Manoj Tiwary when the phone rang, so I told my agent to fill the other names. He added Che Pujara and Yusuf Pathan. That is fine, next year we will pick them up for Delhi. Thank You.
your man, Jatman
It was a strange match, exciting but not thrilling and almost anticlimactic towards the end. It was an upset alright, but perhaps more because Deccan threw the game away than Kolkata winning it. There were plenty of dropped catches, sixes and dot balls and excellent patient innings from Angelo Matthews and Owais Shah before they plundered 70 odd runs off the last five overs. Then there was Gilly's assault... there were the cringe-inducing strokes by the rest of the Deccan batsmen... But the moment that stood out to me is one we should all be sick of...
Just how much cricket have India and Sri Lanka played in recent times? I've lost count but "too much" seems like a fine alternative. And then when Chaminda Vaas dismissed Tiwari, it seemed we were seeing Ind vs SL all over again... retro this time with Vaas bowling to Ganguly in the first over of the match... and three balls later Vaas got his man for a duck... but for a change I didn't feel like kicking the tv or the sofa or whatever... it didn't matter, and it was nice in a way to see Ganguly dismissed by Vaas and not feel affected one little bit by it... maybe even letting a small smile break on my lips.
With just hours to go before the start of the tournament, our Bored Game has a celebrity guest. Yes, BCC!'s very own Jatman has decided to pit his skills against the best the bored has to offer. Many thanks to Achettup and SP in helping me with this arduous job of posting a table here! (Click to go to the league page)
It's a crisis in the Pee Cee Bee. No, not the team losing. That happens often enough. There is the bigger crisis. Not enough money to siphon.
There's a general body meeting - urgent summons is issued to key functionaries. They collect at the poolside of the chairman's house
We, fortunately, have our own fly on the wall, and here's the scoop
(Two men in hoods enter a fortified home, and are escorted to the poolside. Found reclining in the poolside, is Zarda Beedi, the patron.)
Zarda Beedi: So, Mr Ijaazat, where's the monthly hafta
Ijaazat: Sir, thats what we came to discuss sir. Er....Underling, pls explain.
Underling of Ijaazat: The fact of the matter, is, sarcaar..err..we havent brought the hafta
Zarda beedi stands up in anger: What? What did I make you functionaries for
Ijaazat: Sir, you have to understand. We dont get matches to host these days. No revenue generated
Zarda Beedi: What happened to the tour money? Your boys went to Australia, didn they?
Underling: Sir, we lost a lot of money flowing in and out players at their whim, sir.
ZB: What happened to the Dubai matches? Surely, you got some money from there
I: No, Sir. Old dues.
ZB:(exasperated) is there no one in our cricket who makes money? Oh Come on!
Underling(brigthening up): Yes, sir. There are.
I: Eh?
ZB: Thats a good boy. Who?
U: The Players, sir
I: What?
ZB: What?
U: I mean, some of them got IPL contracts, Contracts with Australian states, ICL contracts etc
ZB: Thats really bright, my boy, really bright
I: (alarmed, he shouldnt let the underling hog credit, desparately tries to find a way to impress the cheif)
ZB: So, which of you can think of a way to extract that money from the players to our siphon.
I:(Thinks on his feet, and is on before the underling could move his lips)
Sir, I have a plan sir. Why dont we constitute a committee to inquire into our Australian tour and find scapegoats? We can fine the players, and take away part of their hard-earned cash from other sources
ZB: Brilliant, Ijaazat. You have repaid my trust. When can I expect my cut?
That's right. In true IPL style we're going to unabashedly toot our trumpet. We already have players from all over the globe taking part in our Fantasy League. Rumour is a Dubai-based website has expressed interest in some cross-promotion activities. IPL might have lost out on bidding for two new franchises and have just 8 teams. We already have 18 and you don't have to bid any money to join our league. There is no clause of a $1 billion networth, even people with low self esteem can join in. The only guarantee we want is your active participation. There is no need to spend half a million on downloading a tender. Just go through this and be part of our league!
| Position | Manager | Team Name | Points |
| -- | HundredPercentBarcelonista*LM | The Mahekoholics | 0 |
| -- | Alwin11 | 11 idiots | 0 |
| -- | narayam | Madagascar Penguins | 0 |
| -- | Rishabh | The Not-quite-greats | 0 |
| -- | ONLYME | Nikus X1 | 0 |
| -- | sornakatta | Hara-kiri | 0 |
| -- | destructive_force64 | chessters_11 | 0 |
| -- | nav099 | nav | 0 |
| -- | cornflakes | Footballers XI | 0 |
| -- | aashrey88 | Wibbly Wobbly | 0 |
| -- | aditya.chv | forwardshortleg | 0 |
| -- | Achettup | SoaL Smashers | 0 |
| -- | archit38 | Sons of pitches | 0 |
| -- | JazzAway | Cracked11 | 0 |
| -- | brainstorm87 | xLnC_1 | 0 |
| -- | VelvetFlair | Tweeting Team! | 0 |
| -- | kishorepuria | anubhav11 | 0 |
| -- | tanmayp | KKR_1 | 0 |
© Bored Cricket Crazy Indians
Bored Cricket Crazy Indians is licensed under a
Creative Commons Attribution Noncommercial-no Derivative Works 2.5 India License.
based on a work at boredcricketcrazyindians.com
More »
